BRASS • TACKS

My kids are older now, and recently, when I was straightening up my attic, I lingered over my box of Christmas ornaments wondering if it was time to pass some of them along to my adult kids. I mean, I still host Christmas, but not in the same all-in fashion that I used to. The dynamics of the whole family has shifted with time. And I’m not sad about that, it’s the natural order of things. But I am nostalgic and reflective for sure. Especially that day in the attic where I was flooded with so many memories. Being “present” in the moment is such a buzzy thing these days. But up there, I just needed to be present with my past. 

I still have some of the drug-store ornaments from my first trees. We decorated them with friends in our cramped apartment walk-ups. One of us was pro-tinsel and another one was not, and you could tell we were all just trying to decorate that tree like our families did. They were of course just poor imitations, with our quickly purchased ornament sets and the perpetually dropping needles. That sacrificial tree got absolutely no water. Eventually some comedian would hang up a pack of rolling papers or a crushed beer can. But no one cared. And none of us knew that those early trees were actually us cutting our teeth for our future ones.

And those future trees came quicker than I anticipated with a marriage and a gaggle of babies. During those years, all our ornaments were packed up onto the top two-thirds of the tree. There were just too many little hands at the lower level. Our ornaments had to be sturdy and took on the form of a beloved book character, or a Hot Wheels car, or a tiny teddy bear. My daughter would tiptoe into the kitchen and drag over a chair to carefully remove these sparkly new friends so that they could join with her other dollhouse characters. I’d find them in the oddest places months after the holidays. It was her passion, and she an equal opportunity employer. All were welcome.

The very best part of those years were the ornaments that the kids made. Oh and to be sure they were for the most part gaudy and awful. I still have a few of the sturdy ones, but in general they were just so delicate. With each passing year, the construction paper would fade, the paste would crack, and the glitter would become sparser and sparser. And at the same time, with each passing year, my kids would become less and less interested in seeing that ornament on the tree. My one daughter exclaimed, “Mom, it looks like a baby did that!” Which of course was the point. But it occurs to me now that those ornaments were just as fleeting as the time I got with them as children.  

I’m a collector by nature, and I’ve curated a healthy collection of vintage ornaments. I love the way even just simple balls look when they get old with their imperfections and patina. I put them on the tree, but also in large hurricane vases or dotting my runner on Christmas Eve. And if you’re lucky enough to find a whole set at a rummage sale, they come in the best thin cardboard boxes with silk screened promotions on top. They are just so fun to take out every year. My favorite vintage ornament was given to me by a close friend. It was her grandmother’s who she adored. And it really just felt like she was sharing with me a piece of her heart. 

I used to go to an ornament Yankee Swap. It’s a group gift trading thing, where there is always the most popular one that everyone "steals". For years I was on a quest to bring that ornament. I put in the effort, too. I looked year round, and I also wrapped mine very beautifully so someone would open it right away. But year after year, my ornament was overlooked. It was topped once by a tasteful glass octopus and another time by a mouse dressed up like an elf. But finally, I did it! Every one wanted my ornament! It was bitter sweet though, because it was a Santa that farted Jingle Bells when you pushed his belly. I mean…. just go figure.

I have a few ornaments that mark a place or time. I picked up a glass ball with ears at DisneyWorld, and display a beautiful pine cone I found in Arizona. In 2020 I bought two dozen Santa-in-a-mask ornaments to leave on my friend’s doorsteps. It marks a year many of us would like to forget, but there were silver linings there too. I do think fondly of creating “pods” with brave friends, having far-flung children come home to roost for a while, and hosting some raucous Zoom happy hours with my sister and her kids. There are always silver linings. Sometimes it just takes time to be able to see them.

One year our basement flooded and we lost a bunch of ornaments with it. We lost a lot of other stuff too, but the ornaments were the only thing I cared about. It came in a year which just seemed swollen with challenges and I took that loss very hard. It symbolized something I just found unbearable. But I had this friend with angel wings, and she organized a pot luck dinner where everyone came with a dish to share and an ornament for me as a surprise. I still choke up when I unwrap them. I wrote the initials of the person that gave it to me teeny-tiny on the bottom so that I would always remember. During that time I had a friend tell me: Life doesn’t get easier, we just get better at hard. That really rang true, and I think we do that with the help of our friends. 

So there I was, in the attic, surrounded by ornaments and their memories. What did I do? Was it time to pass some of them along? Could I bare to part with some of those sentiments? The answer is, I don’t know. I left them in tidy little piles. I’ll see my kids at Thanksgiving and can ask them what they think. It’s complicated, because if I distribute them too it to early, they will feel like I’m abandoning their memories. And if I do it too late, they will already have a full tree of their own. 

Me? I’ve thought about it a lot. And I think I can pass many of them along if they want them. Because I’m not getting rid of the memories. I’ve packed those up and tucked them into my heart. They’ll be with me whenever I need them.

This article was originaly published in The Manchester Cricket.

Are ADU’s 4U?
I have long been obsessed with discovering how people live in small spaces. One year for my birthday, I dragged my husband and four young children to the RV show at the convention center in Boston. And I wasn’t even really in the market for an RV. I thought the kids would enjoy popping into all these little dwellings, but they really weren’t. And soon enough my kids were on the sidelines holding soft pretzels and popcorn while my then-husband drank a beer. They were just waiting me out.

And don’t even get me started on house boats! Along the marsh side of Ipswich, the landscape is just littered with them. Some of them completely home made - just a shed on a raft made with old oil tanks welded together. And others look like they belong on a lake in the midwest - kind of kitchy and cool in a tri-level, 1960’s type of way. And still others look like full throttle homes - with gingerbread detailing, generators, kitchens, and a large back deck. Do their sheets get damp at night, I wonder? Do their kids wear life preservers just all the time? Would you feel cooped up if you were on it for a weekend, even with the views?  

I digress, but you can now imagine my excitement when Accessory Dwelling Units (ADU’s) became a hot topic in Massachusetts. Starting in February of 2025, recent legislation will allow all single family homes to build one if they meet the requirements. Hey, that’s right around the corner! Undoubtedly, there are still more questions than answers on how this will all pan out, and I can’t begin to shed any light on the policy end of things, but I can on their design and construction. I mean, it’s almost like having a houseboat in your back yard, right?

But let me first qualify that by saying that ADU’s can be lots of things. In my head I always think of them as cute little freestanding units, but they don’t have to be that. They can be accessory apartments, in-law suites, granny flats, a basement or garage conversion, or an attached addition to your existing home. They are related to the Affordable Homes Act and are meant to provide relief to the housing shortage. They can’t be more than 900 square feet, and they are not to be used for short term rentals. Other states have used them, California most notably, and have found them to be successful so their popularity is spreading. 

This will be welcome news for you homeowner’s that have had to carefully refer to that additional space in your basement as an in-law or an au-pair suite. Yup, you could have them, but zoning prevented you from ever renting them. But don’t start writing that Zillow listing yet. Make sure you understand what’s involved with getting an occupancy permit for that rental. Safety standards must be adhered to, especially the need for two egresses which can trip-up some existing basement or attic apartments. 

As a designer, I’ve worked on building out small spaces more and more in recent years. They are fun to work on, in a sudoko-puzzle sort of way, because they can be tricky for sure. I can sneak bed space in easily enough, but kitchens and bathrooms are more challenging. And I guess my biggest take-away from that experience is that you are actually building a house. It may be a small house, but it’s still a house.

So all the sub-contractors you need for a full-sized house, (plumbing, sewer, electric, HVAC, insulation, roofing, siding, etc.) you will still need for this cute, little, it’s-no-big-deal, it’s-practically-a-shed, ADU. And because of this, they are surprisingly expensive to build. So it sometimes comes down to, how bad do you want it? Because even though it sounds fun and easy, you may be surprised by how long it will take for that rental income to offset the construction costs. 

But everyone’s situation is different. Maybe you are an empty-nester, and you are the one who will be living in the ADU while renting your larger home, which will in turn pay for your warm weather escape down south. Or maybe your young family has grown to the point that you absolutely need an ADU to use as a home office for now, but will rent it down the road. All that sheds a new light on your ADU financials. 

Are there lower cost alternatives? Well ADU’s are a hot topic on the internet, and for a low investment you can buy yourself a set of plans suitable for permitting. You’ll of course need to be an intrepid do-it-yourselfer, and it’s not something I would take on. But some of you will - and will undoubtedly succeed. 

Also, there are pre-fab options. They run the gamut on cost and on how much is included. For instance, some of the larger shed companies are promoting their wares as ADU’s. But many of those come as just a framed shell (otherwise known as a shed,) so once again there’s still lots of work involved with getting it up and running. 

But keep googling, because they also sell these ready-to-assemble kits. You can even buy them from Amazon or Wayfair, and their computer generated pics make them look ok I guess. But for my money, here in New England, I would buy something sturdy.

If pre-made were my thing, I would choose a reputable, prefabricated house company that guarantees an airtight finished product, complete with a kitchen and bath. No kits for me, I would want it turn-key and ready to go. Luckily there are plenty of those companies to choose from.

And let’s quickly talk about prefab homes, because I think they get an undeserved bad rap. True they once represented the cheapest way to put up cookie-cutter house after cookie-cutter house. But many companies have come a long way - you just have to find the right ones. Their designs can be varied and well-thought out. And there is something to be said (especially in New England) for building the bulk of your home in a controlled, indoor environment with craftsmen that do nothing but work on these particular houses all day long. Plus they are in a position to negotiate good prices for their supplies and many of them use environmentally friendly products. 

The turn-key, prefab ADU’s come in all shapes and sizes. From shingled New England-style, to Scandanavian A-frames, to some that are just made of glass and steel. You just have to figure out what’s right for you. Additionally, try looking up “prefab park models.” It’s an interesting little niche market of companies building cottage/cabins for camp grounds and national parks. 

But all that said, the question still remains, will a prefab unit be cheaper than one that is stick-built? Well, by the time you use a reputable prefab company, do the site work, get it installed, and hook it up to all it’s services? I guess I would tend to say, usually yes - it will be a little less expensive. But probably not the savings you anticipated.

Because at the end of the day, you are building a house. It may be a small house, but it’s still a house.

This article was originally published in The Manchester Cricket

Which Way Does Your House Lean?

A while ago a friend of mine bought an old house which needed a lot of work. Work which he was hoping to partially do himself. He asked me to stop by because he wanted some advice. He was worried about the house. Worried about what he paid for it, all that it needed, and how much money he didn’t have for renovation. He’d spun himself into such a state that he had asked me over to see what kind of work he should do to put the house back on the market. 

Let me assure you, this was a beautiful house with solid bones. It had high ceilings and well proportioned gracious rooms. It had tall baseboards and detailed window trim, and lots of character with a built-in cubby here and a lead-paned window there. What else did it have? Well, it had the problems that lots of old homes do. It had bulging and cracked horse-hair plaster walls. It had drafty windows and shallow closets. The floors sloped in certain areas and were crudely patched in others. 

This wasn’t my client. He was a friend. I showed up with muffins and coffee. We walked around and he told me that he hadn’t planned on new dry wall for the whole house, and that the windows that had looked so pretty from the street were actually drafty and needed to be replaced. There were other flaws he listed; the old clawfoot tub with rust stains, the exposed pipes, the dumb waiter the kids would get trapped in, and so on. After he got it all out, I put my hand on his shoulder and gently told him that I thought he was approaching his house all wrong. 

Because every house has a point of view, and also a tipping point. And when you are renovating you have to figure out what yours are. Be careful about moving into that older home, with a DIY mindset, and getting hung up on a certain type of Instagram-worthy end result. Unless you have deep pockets of course. 

So be careful about ripping down the cracked horsehair plaster from one wall while wanting to keep the other walls that were marginally better. Because if you do, you may be embarking on a tail-chasing journey that I call, “give a mouse a cookie.” It’s a children’s book reference about a mouse that knocks on your door and asks for a cookie. Then he wants a glass of milk. Then a mirror to check for a milk mustache. And then he wants some clippers to trim his hair… and, well, you get the idea. And in this example your house is that mouse. 

Because if you put up one crisp clean wall of drywall in a room where the other walls are original, you’ll realize the other walls want that drywall too. And after you do that, you will have to replace your trim which will now be crisp and clean with precise edges and sharp lines. But it will not match the soft-edged, weathered trim in the rest of the house. And then there are the windows, with their ancient wavy paned glass, that now really look out of place. The next thing you know, your house is asking you for clippers so that it can trim it’s hair just like that mouse.

Please don’t get me wrong, there is absolutely nothing wrong with taking a sad old house and stripping it down the studs and replacing everything. Sometimes it’s necessary, and it can be done with love and care so that your old home, with it’s new materials, looks sort of old again - but sharper. And everything is plumb and square and there is no lead paint and the windows all tilt-in for easy cleaning. I work on houses like that all the time and the results are amazing. It just takes time, skill and money. 

And by the way, I never replace everything. There are always things worth saving. Maybe it’s the original fireplace mantel, or a light fixture I get re-wired. Or maybe I take those old wood planks and turn them into a rustic vanity base or a door to your pantry. Because all these old homes tell a story, and you don’t want to lose the history in yours.

So back to my muffin eating friend. What did I tell him, while his head was spinning with all the cookies he thought he had to give his house? Well I pointed out my perspective on his gorgeous antique home, keeping in mind his budget and time line of course. I saw a grand old lady that had been standing for over a hundred years and would probably be standing in a hundred more. 

I suggested he lean-in to the imperfect nature of the horsehair plaster. It’s sweet evidence of the housebuilding methods of a by-gone era. True, the cracks are temperamental and they may need repeated attention, but you can fill them and then paint the wall a flat finish and I love the character at the end. And same goes for that baseboard and window trim. Lean-in to those dings and scrapes. They are like your home’s laugh-lines. They were earned and they tell the story of prior generations. Plus, that kind of detail in a home is harder and harder to find. 

I bought a set of chairs from an antique shop once, and I was raising an eyebrow at the wear that was showing on all of their bottom rungs. The shop owner said, “Oh that comes from years of use. don’t change that!” And it always stuck with me because I think he was right.

My friend’s old windows? Try a good set of storms for now. The wavy glass? They look that way because of the years gravity has been pulling them down. They’ve earned their right to stay for now too. The rusty tub? Get it re-faced. The exposed pipes? Box them in if you must, or just paint them the wall color for now. They’re just proof that the house didn’t start with extensive plumbing. The patched floors? Don’t sweat them too much. They are just another element that traces the story of your home and they’ll recede once they are refinished and possibly stained. 

Are there exceptions to all that? Of course there are. You don’t want to live with something if it’s covering up deeper problem. So if you are getting mold stains repeatedly in one area you should find out where that water is coming from. And there are things that are never old-house charming; like scratched door trim from a dog wanting out, or water stains on the ceiling, or floors that need refinishing, or some of those “improvements” they made in the 1970’s. So common sense is in order here. 

But ultimately it doesn’t matter if you are going for that new-house crisp look, or that old-house look with generations of charm. It’s just helpful to know which way your are leaning, and to keep that in mind for your home renovation projects. Especially before you tackle a larger project like a kitchen or a pantry.

How did my friend do, you may be wondering? Well I saw him at a party a few months later. And it may have been his martini talking, but he stayed in that house and even credited me with turning his whole renovation around. So yes, he leaned-in to those lumpy walls and the imperfect trim and said it all looked great. And that’s good news for the mouse… I mean the house…. because eating a whole box of cookies isn’t good for anyone.

This article was originally published in The Manchester Cricket

Finding Middle ground

There are lots of reasons someone might want to hire an interior designer. And usually it’s exactly that - lots of reasons, not just one. But the big ones are frequently the same for most clients. Most are after a polished look that they’re not sure they can create on their own. They also usually want some guidance on navigating a complicated construction process, and help with decision making for all the materials that their project requires. 

But the nuts and bolts of doing my job may include more subtle dynamics to navigate as well. One issue I encounter frequently is when couples have different ideas on what their project will be and how they want it to look. This can present an emotional snarl for sure, so I tread carefully and try to stay analytic in my approach to finding common ground. 

I start with the broadest of strokes: let’s first determine what exactly your project will be. Because for an initial meeting that isn’t necessarily clear. Maybe your wish-list is larger than your budget and you need help creating a phase-one and a phase-two plan. Or maybe you are desperate for a mudroom but your partner wants to prioritize a wet bar, which may put you and your mate at odds.

When faced with this situation, I like to break things down into terms of your home’s core functionality. It’s a very basic concept. In my opinion, every home needs to have the capacity to keep its tenants healthy, warm, dry and reasonably organized. Because it is this designer’s belief system that those qualities are the cornerstones of creating happiness in a home. Am I wildly over-symplifying? Absolutely! But I still think there’s a kernal of truth there worth acknowledging.

I remember moving from a small house to a bigger one. Our family had unexpectedly grown, and then grown again, and our latest bundle was sleeping in a laundry basket between our two bureaus. So we moved to another house that wasn’t the most charming, but it had the right number of bedrooms and was smartly outfitted with an area for toys, and a mudroom, and a walk-up attic, and the like. I remember looking around that empty house and thinking to myself, if I lived here I think I’d be a better parent. 

And when I got there, I kind of was. I found that the stakes were just lower on lots of everyday things. Take having a mudroom for example. Suddenly it wasn’t the end of the world if the kids just dumped their stuff willy nilly in their hurry to tell me about their day. And I didn’t have to punctuate their every entrance with a nag about where their things should go. My two girls that were closest in age? They finally got their own rooms so their relationship improved. We didn’t stay in that house for very long, but I’ve always remembered the nice feeling of the pressure being released from my parenting valve just a little bit. That’s the kind of impact some core functionality can have in your life. 

So that’s the first thing I do with two clients who are not on the same page. I try to help them prioritize the projects that allow them to live better. After that, it’s like any other negotiation, you kind of swap out something for one and then something for the other. I pepper in some guidance along the way of course. I know a screening room in the basement will be expensive, and I also know that a simple build-out in the laundry room will be small money with a big impact. So I can use my experience to give their wish-list some perspective. 

But that’s only half the battle, because the aesthetics of what their project will actually look like can create yet another wrinkle for certain couples. And I don’t mean that one person has “good” taste and one person has “bad”. I just mean that they need to cohabitate in a space that feels comfortable to both of them. In general, I think it’s unproductive for these folks to adhere to one over-riding theme like “white farmhouse chic” or “mid century modern”.  I think something more eclectic can be more interesting anyway, and it’s a nice way to meet in the middle.

That said, eclectic can be hard to pull off.  Especially if you are in the market for one-off’s, like we just need a sofa or we just need a new bureau. Because this could be the moment your mate takes you to the mat for that shiny leather sofa that gets plopped into your Laura Ashley living room, with a: “But I’ve been living with all these florals, why can’t we have just one thing I like?” You can see it’s a tricky business. And one that can be more emotional than it seems on the surface. We were brought up with certain styles, we are bombarded with all the “shoulds” built into social media, and we’ve all spent time in rooms we have hated or we have loved. Opinions can run deep and heels can easily dig in.

And when all that is going on? Well, I think it’s a good time to take a beat. Have the next conversation with your mate be about the life you are building together. And not your instagram worthy life; but your true and genuine, messy and wonderful, warts and all, real-life. How do you both want to live it? Do you entertain formally? Do your children have enough room to thrive? Are there pets in the picture? We are people with passions and the important ones should be accommodated. For some people that’s one hundred pairs of shoes, for others it’s action figure collectables. It is not our place to judge, because a home is about accommodating real life, not the other way around. 

I also find Pinterest to be helpful here. It’s a good place to find designs that you both like. Those pictures can be so valuable. I know people that return to their same 3-4 inspiration photos again and again during a renovation. They take them to the tile store and they use them when they talk to the floor refinishers. I use them with clients all the time, to remind them of the look that we agreed we are going for. 

Can that look change as the job progresses? Absolutely, and usually it should. But let’s know when we adjust our goal so we can stay focused on the new one. The beautiful thing is, your finished project will not look like that photo you’ve been carting around. And that’s a good thing, because your project will always be unique to you. You and your mate bring your own special mojo into your home, and if you do it right, your choices along the way will reflect that mututally. 

So hug your partner, enjoy your kids, and remember to pause when the pressure builds. Because those qualities are also the cornerstones of creating happiness in your home. And they don’t even need a construction budget.

This article was originally published in The Manchester Cricket

It’s early June and it’s one of my favorite times of year. We’re in the middle of this summer’s Big Reveal, and it is presenting with a giant “Ta-dah!”

All the leaves are unfurled, the trees are full, the mulch edges are crisp, and the window boxes and porch plantings are lush with water and fertilizer. It’s like how your kids look on their first day of school, with their clean notebooks, new lunchboxes and fresh outfits from the mall. Really, your neighborhood will never look better than it does right now. So breath in that smell of freshly cut grass and take a moment to enjoy it. 

Things can look a little different in August. By then some of our container plants shrivel while we vacation, our lawns suffer from the water bans, and our tomatoes can get the blight. And us? We’re all a little too punch-drunk from the heat to care like we do right now. But don’t take offense, August, I’m not complaining. I love your hazy, lazy long days of summer. But it’s all the more reason to mix yourself a drink right now and sit out on that freshly power-washed lawn furniture of yours. Because this perfection won’t last forever.

And now that you’re out there, how is that outdoor experience for you? It’s a natural time to ask that question. Your energy is fresh, you are reacquainting yourself with some furniture that has spent the winter in the shed, and you are figuring out what goes where. You may already have a list going for candle votives and outdoor cushions and the like. But it’s also a great time to think about larger projects and what you might want to change down the road. Not in a despairing, oh-my-outdoor-oasis-is-crap sort of way. But more like you are sowing some contemplative seeds. And as you think about those plans over the summer, some ideas may take root and others will not. 

What are some typical improvements to consider? Well, re-thinking your grilling area can make entertaining easier. There are of course the full-blown outdoor kitchens complete with running water and an island, but you don’t have to go that far. For grilling, you should first think about location. Ideally you want something that is both out of the way, but not isolating. You don’t want the smoke blowing into your guests faces, but you do want to allow room for those friends that like hang by the grill offering moral support to the cook. Maybe you find a spot just a little bit around a corner, but hopefully it is close to a kitchen door or window so food can be passed easily.

If your grill is gas and you also have a gas stove inside, consider having a gas line installed so that you can skip the propane tanks that inevitably run out at the worst time. (Shouldn’t there be a gauge on those things?) Also, consider some outdoor counter space. It’s so handy to be able to set down one platter and grab another while in the midst of flipping burgers. This counter space can be as easy as buying some outdoor metal shelving and topping it with a piece of granite. The weight of that stone on top makes the shelving sturdy, and stone remnants are affordable. Or free if you know someone that is renovating.

Another outdoor feature to consider is a pergola. They are an affordable way to add some shade plus a good amount of architectural interest. They can be modern or traditional, and made from wood or a man made product like metal or PVC. You can easily shop online because many of them come as kits and they can stand alone or butt up next to your home. On their own they do help to break up the intensity of the sun, especially with some climbing plants. But if you want solid shade, you can buy a canvas cover or add other materials to really block it out. I picture pergola’s in the back yard. But I saw someone dress up a little cape cod style home with a front deck and a pergola and it looked really cute. Plus it’s a much more affordable option than a traditional front porch.

A favorite backyard enhancement for beach lovers is an outdoor shower. Check in with permitting first and make sure you have the environmental approvals to build one, but if you can they are so worth it. Outdoor showers can be decidedly low-brow and as simple as a cold water shower head mounted above the faucet for your hose. Or they can be decidedly high-brow with teak decking and multiple hot-water shower heads. Most people land between the two, and if you are after a bargain this is another product that is frequently sold as a kit online. I like the ones that have two spaces inside - one for showering and one for dressing with a little bench. But regardless of what you choose, think carefully about your drainage first. Because nothing is worse than showering in a puddle. Except for standing in someone else's sudsy puddle as it oozes out onto your patio.

Firepits are popular, but I’m sort of 50/50 on those. They are great if you have the space to dedicate to just that function. But otherwise I find they hog up too much square footage considering how much they actually get used. But I know they are a must-have for some of you, and if that's you, consider a freestanding one with a flat cover. That way it also works as a coffee table when the fire isn’t going. For me? I’m actually more of a fan of something I would call a “fire feature.” I like the propane ones that have a spot for that tank built right in. They can be tall cubes, or low rectangles. They can be round or square. They can be placed front and center, or hangout in the background. I like them even more if they’re on wheels, because I’m not a girl that likes to be locked into one seating configuration.

And my final words on backyard bliss is about lighting; and those words are solar, solar, solar. Where I used to roll my eyes and think of solar lights as dim little add-ons and silly landscaping features, I now take my hat off and celebrate how far they’ve come. To be sure, these are not lights you would necessarily do needlepoint underneath, and they require sun to charge during the day of course; but for ambient lighting I think they are great. I like them for the cafe-style string lights, and also for these stand-alone…. well I’m at a loss as to what to call them. I know if I google “solar lighting orbs” they come up. They are almost like portable, glowing lamps that you can scatter outside or put on tables. Some are even waterproof to float on your pool. Go take a look and see what you think. The no outlet needed thing is just so liberating.

And the best part about all this? We are just sowing seeds here. No reason to jump up and do anything right now. No reason at all. Just keep on enjoying this summer’s first day of school.

This article was originally printed in The Manchester Cricket

Reflections

Sadly, I attended a memorial service last week. It was for one of my college friends who experienced life with such a unique and vivacious spirit that it felt just cruel to no longer have her with us. Memorial services are hands-down sad, and oddly, sometimes uproariously funny. This one was no exception. But hearing the stories of all the people she had touched was really meaningful. I understood her more at the end, this woman with all her complex layers.

As it turns out, I only knew a sliver of her. Which is wonderful. She had this rich, full life in ways I had never really bothered to imagine, I guess. I know that sounds terrible, and here's one more: Does it make me horribly self involved to say I drove home thinking about my own life? I couldn’t help it. It all just made me think about how I want to live. Whose lives I hope to touch. And what I want to leave behind.

I am conscious that parts of that sentiment are a familiar theme when I talk to potential clients about their homes and their lifestyles. One of my first questions is, what would they like to change? Or as I sometimes say, “Tell me what’s working for you and what’s not.” At it’s core, that’s me asking them how they want to live. Not that how you live in your home defines you one hundred percent as a human, with all your own complex layers. There is much more to you than that. But on the other hand, it’s not an unimportant piece of who you are either.

The responses I get, when I’m touring a home and talking about possible improvements, defy categorizing. I can’t tell you that old-money will respond this way, and new-money will respond that way. I can’t even tell you that couples will be aligned with one another. But a successful meeting is when I’ve given them something to think about when I leave, whether they hire me or not.

But I have a pretty good sense of what improvements may dramatically improve their lifestyle. For instance, I once encouraged a client to go ahead and upgrade their hot water tank as part of their bathroom renovation. They lived in a quirky old home, and I happened to hear them make reference to having cold showers. Honestly, I barely remember the exchange. But a few years ago I bumped into that client and she thanked me so profusely for pushing that particular improvement through. She laughed and used the words “life changing.”

I have a client now whose kitchen island has a counter that over-hangs the cabinets by just four inches, which is sort of a head-scratcher. It’s longer than the traditional half inch overhang, yet way short of the twelve inches needed to sit even somewhat comfortably. And yet, I see the stools they’ve tucked there underneath those four little inches. And I know they are probably eating their cereal perched on those stools, with their knees crunched in and their shoulders hunched. That counter was not on their wish list during our walk-thru, but I’m going to suggest a new one anyway to see what they think.

This sort of decision making, the how-am-I-going-to-live part of it, reminds me of a doctor appointment I had years ago. I was in the thick of raising my four kids. and it had taken me a few years to get to my annual physical. In it, I described an ailment I had and the compromises I was making in my life to accommodate it. My doctor asked how long this had been going on, and I said, “Oh, maybe a year or so.” He looked up from his notes, cocked his head and said very matter-of-fact, “Well, you don’t have to live like that.” And suddenly I was blinking back tears. It was like he gave me permission to live better.

Which is sometimes all we need. On my very best day, I’d like to think I can do that. I hope that if I listen intently enough, and intuit smart enough, and rely on my experience well enough, that I too can offer that permission to live better. I just wish there wasn’t a price tag attached. Because then I would be the fairy godmother of home improvement and how fun would that be?

During those initial walk-throughs I hear so much. There are the people that say, “Well we’ve lived with it this long, I think we’ll leave it alone.” And the people that describe a problem and then say, “but I don’t think it’s fixable.” Or those that reveal a secret desire to me about something like a soaking tub, but they do it in a whisper because they think it’s frivolous or indulgent.

And, in fact, I’m not their fairy godmother, but I sure wish I was. Because I think it all matters, and it’s all important! YOU matter. And how you live is important. Your home is a vessel, a place that allows you and your loved ones to be their best selves. Not all the time, of course. But I’m willing to bet more often than not.

- This article was originally published in The Manchester Cricket

What’s New?

Spring is finally starting to be sprung. Those brave spring bulbs are sticking their skinny green necks out, and so far all I’ve wanted to do is wrap a scarf around them - but they are determined. Good for them. I love the newness in the air. The expectation of change.

And It all gets me thinking about where we are going with design these days. Which is worth talking about because I think we are in a really interesting transitional phase. Design is slowly ushering out some of the rigid adherence to everything gray, which includes the carerra marble, quartz countertops, and white kitchens that have been associated with that period. And that’s a significant shift because the gray period has been with us for the better part of 15 years.

So what are we ushering in? Well, lots of things - which, as a designer, I find both interesting and also somewhat liberating. Because in this transitional space there aren’t as many rules to follow, or preconceived notions of what a home should look like. There is more room than ever to let you-do-you, which is frequently the beginning of the most inspired design. I do recognize, however, that some may feel frustrated by the loosey-goosey nature of this transition. I mean, what if you just finished painting the last room in your house gray? You would be understandably resentful if you now felt you were expected to incorporate… well, what?? What is it exactly?

I hear you. But here’s the first thing to remember. It’s you-do-you, right? So hang on to those grays as long as they are serving you. There is no timeline, or design police. You will not be arrested. And a warm home that reflects the joys and challenges of its inhabitants doesn’t really care what color it’s painted. Plus, design trends don’t so much change, as they evolve. You’ll find plenty of ways to add a pillow here or a duvet cover there to keep up with it all. And you can assess more lasting changes when you next need to paint or replace your couch.

But that said, it’s also a good time to educate your eye toward what’s new. Because why not? There’s no pressure, and it’s kind of fun to know what’s out there. Organic is a word that comes to my mind when I try to encompasses the changes that I’m noticing. Where the grays were about coolness, smoothness, straight lines and expansiveness; the “organic’s” are about warmth, texture, natural curves and cozier spaces.

And to this end, I celebrate the undeniable fact that natural wood is officially IN. Architecturally, much of it is currently blonde and in a matte finish, but that may change. But you’ll notice it being used for kitchen pantries, or in tailored Scandinavian style beams, or in the shelves of a built-in bookcase. Or in all three places so the warmth is balanced throughout. I’m also noticing the increased use of one-of-a-kind furniture pieces - which is a niche industry I’ve been supporting for years. These “bespoke” pieces make great coffee tables or bed-frames, but I also incorporate them into my built-in features by using them for vanities, counter tops, or kitchen islands.

Wider planked, light-wood floors in a shine-free finish is a trend I’m guessing we will see for a while. And if you are in the market, it’s worth going to a high-quality flooring store to review the options. There really are some amazing alternatives to traditional wood out there - some of them with a lifetime warrantee. I frequently use these products in basements, but the quality has gotten so good that I think they may be ready for prime time. Not to say natural wood floors aren’t amazing, because they are (and will never go out of style), but as I get old and crotchety I get more and more attracted to maintenance-free.

Color-wise, the neutral warms are starting to make their way back in as the cool grays, well, cool. But remember, light neutrals seem to defy categories. A warm gray may pull towards green in one light and then pull towards tan in another. If that’s not your thing, then use a color that’s a bit darker. In general the more pigment the color has in it, the more stable the color is in different lighting.

At the other end of the color spectrum, I am loving bold colors like earthy greens, or terra cottas, or purply-browns. Or yes, some of those rich jewel tones. I’ve had great results painting a whole room the same dramatic color - walls, trim, built-ins, ceilings - all of it. (Just watch your pets because I’ll paint them too.) Or sometimes I just hit the ceiling with color or maybe just the window trim. Conversely, you can get your drama by pulling the trigger on that velvet couch you’ve been eyeing in raspberry. It’s you-do-you after all! But remember, In some ways you need the courage to go all-in, but in other ways it’s still all about balance. So proceed with some caution here.

You may also be noticing some changes in the catalogs in your mailbox. The upholstered furniture used to be square and clean, sitting on metal legs and covered in crisp fabrics or leather. But now we are seeing the introduction of the curve. You’ll notice the upholstered furniture is sort of round and bulbous and molded. The new ones tend to sit low to the ground and are covered in fabrics that have lots of texture. It’s really a dramatic change in that furniture industry and I’m curious to see where it all lands. Although I must admit that a few of those pieces remind me of the bubble letters I used to write my name in as a kid.

Another way curve I really like is in the introduction of crescent-shaped sofas. They still look fresh to me, and it can do wonders to cozy up the conversation area in your family room. You do need some square footage to make this look work though; I think those couches need some room to breath.

And one last “curve” ball is that many people are saying the open floor plan is out and that people now want enclosed spaces with some privacy, especially with the work-from-home push of late. I tend to land in the middle on this one. I mean, I’ve always enjoyed some closed-in spaces, especially in rooms specific to a task, like working. But I’ve also always really appreciated what an open floor plan, with their expansive sight-lines, can accomplish. So I think you need to just carefully pick and choose on that front and not think too much about the trends.

And there you have it. I just said it. Pick and choose what works for you. It’s nice to be aware of what’s out there, but you-do-you, because that’s where the most inspired design originates.

- This article was originally published in The Manchester Cricket

it’s not a competition but It’s How You Finish That Counts

I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but it’s the wild west out there when it comes to the finishes we find on hardware, bathroom fixtures, and lighting. Where we used to have just a few choices (our old friends chrome, polished nickel, and satin nickel) there are now about eleventy-hundred. Suddenly we’re faced with finishes like champagne bronze, graphite, and brushed chrome. I mean, what’s a homeowner to do with so many options?

Of all these new finishes I get questions on gold the most. Isn’t it a trend? Won’t I regret using it? All good questions. But first off, I don’t think of trends as a terrible thing, although I do try to stay away from fads. Fads have a very short shelf life and will definitely date your project prematurely. Trends can last a much longer time, and are somewhat unavoidable. Like in the 90’s everyone wanted their tuscan Italian kitchen with it’s warm colors and tumbled travertine tile. In some iteration, that trend lasted a very long time.

Similarly, we are currently nearing the end of another long trend, and that’s the prolific use of gray. We are shifting away from the all-carerra marble bathrooms with neutral gray walls and white vanities. As a designer, it was near impossible to ignore that powerful gray-trend. It’s in magazines and instagram posts and fixer-upper tv shows, so it becomes the look that many clients think they want.

So where does that put us with all these new finishes? Well, one thing that I think is here to stay is the concept of multiple finishes. Who knows if the “brushed silver” of tomorrow will push out the “champagne ice” of today - but the fact that we are going to be seeing lots of different finishes is here to stay. I’m betting on a few to become new classics that will stand the test of time, like black for instance. But I think some of those very yellow golds may already be marching their way down to the sale aisle.

For me, the biggest problem with that yellow gold finish is that is just so GOLD. It’s very in-you-face and can have such a strong opinion that it wants to be matched with more gold, everywhere. In larger bathrooms, this can be problematic. Gold for your faucet leads to gold vanity hardware, lighting, mirror trim, towel bars, and even the hardware on your glass shower doors. And suddenly your bathroom may tilt a little Liberace. Which, don’t get me wrong, can be a great thing! But maybe not as a surprise. So lean into that look, or proceed with caution.

What are the workarounds? Well, try it in a half bath, because you won’t see as much of it so. But you’ll still need to swap out your toilet lever and maybe the visible water-supply line too. Generally small bathrooms like their finishes to be super matchy-matchy, so you really have to see it through.

For larger bathrooms, I usually don’t want my finishes to pop too much. If I’m using gold, I’m using one of the softer variations that tend to recede into the background. Of course it’s a tricky business because each manufacturer uses different names, like champagne bronze, or brushed gold, or tumbled brass. And even more confounding is that if you do happen to find two manufacturers that actually each have a “champagne bronze”, you’ll find that their colors still don’t match. So you have to keep an open mind about the whole thing and be ready to pivot on game day.

Another way to de-emphasize that gold finish is to mix it up and combine two (but not three) different finishes. This needs to be done thoughtfully however, so do your research. Black is a great, fairly ubiquitous companion, for instance. It can be friends with chrome or gold or graphite or brass. So maybe you have a graphite faucet fixture and cabinet hardware, but you use black in your mirror and sconces. If you get it right it can look really great.

Google is your friend here. Look at what other people are doing and see what you like. Some designers will actually offer you their approved combinations. And that’s good because there are some unexpected pairings that I am partial to as well, like brushed gold with satin nickel. It sounds odd but they are both brushed finishes and they seem to like each other just fine. Another is copper or brass with oil rubbed bronze. But all designers are different, so take their recommendations (and mine too) with a grain of salt.

Untreated brass, or unlaquered brass, is a newer finish that I love. I say newer, but It’s been in homes around here and in Europe for centuries. Using brass can scratch that itch I may have for gold, but is more organic and timeless. It’s got a beautiful finish that develops a patina over time, and becomes packed with character. They call this a “living finish.” Some clients are impatient, and that’s understandable because right out of the box unlaquered brass has an alarmingly bright (dare I say brassy?) gold shine. It takes a few years to really develop it’s patina, and I love the journey. But if you don’t, there are products that can hurry the aging process along.

Another, more subtle, way of getting the warmth of gold without the gold is to use polished nickel. It’s that higher-end finish that is similar to chrome but has a subtle and soothing warmth in it’s highlights. It’s everywhere, and you’ve definitely seen it. Unfortunately this is another one of those finishes that can vary from manufacturer to manufacturer, so stick with the same brand if possible.

And I can’t leave the topic of finishes without giving a shout-out to the work-horse, the under-appreciated, the timeless, most flexible finish of them all and its name is chrome! It’s the least expensive of all the finishes and an added bonus is that all chromes match. So you can splurge on your faucet and then bargain hunt for your towel bars, and no one will be the wiser. I’ve used it in utilitarian mudrooms, laundry areas and outdoor showers, as well as in very nice primary bathrooms and kitchens. So in this land of excessive finishes, don’t over look an old friend.

Lastly, if you are struggling with where to put your maybe-faddy, maybe-trendy details? Put them in places that are easy to change. Like towel bars, cabinet hardware, paper towel holders or vanity accessories. Because Liberace can sometimes be best enjoyed in small doses.

– This article was originally printed in The Manchester Cricket.

Recently while driving, I glanced to my left as a well-loved car was passing. I’m pretty sure that car was painted with house-paint and a paintbrush. It makes me pause and it’s a hmmmmm moment for sure, but I find myself smiling and wanting to catch my neighbors eye. Why? Because there is this unifying element at play here.

It’s an instinct near to my heart that so many of us share; this urge to make something look better. Or to improve the places where we spend our time. Or to have those places be a closer reflection of who we are. I’m not really sure why, but somehow it makes me want to tip my hat to this fellow human and say, “I get it“ and “me too.”

I see that common instinct take on many forms. Some of us embark on expensive home renovations, while others buy a cement donkey for the front yard or carefully duct tape over a dented fender. But regardless of what drives you, I think we can all agree that the humble can of paint is frequently up to the task. Nothing is better suited to the job of a high-impact improvement with low-impact investment than a coat of paint.

I’m no stranger to the wonders of it. I shake my head when I think about the “improvements” I used to make to a host of sketchy rental apartments in my youth. I mean I never painted my car, but I did paint a rusty refrigerator with house paint once. Which makes just about the same kind of sense, so this glass house will be throwing no stones.

I knew painting that fridge wasn’t right when I did it. But I also knew I’d probably be long gone before that fridge shed its new layer of skin. And that’s an important distinction actually. You really can paint just about anything if your only goal is to buy yourself a little time. Paint can do that. It can also, when done properly, create lasting change that will stand up to the years.

And all that makes paint the perfect muse for these long, dark days of February. If you’re like me, you are craving a quick change that’s not too big of a project. And, again, if you're like me, you may also be craving half a tray of mac and cheese. But first things first.

What paint projects are good candidates? Oh so, so many. How about a new color for your stair risers, your mudroom built-in, the back panels of bookshelves, or a bedroom ceiling? Or whip out some spray paint and quickly upgrade your light fixtures, or even (with the proper masking) your doorknobs and hinges. Try painting all your interior doors a light neutral tone and be amazed at the impact of this subtle change.

You can have fun with a powder room by painting it all one color: walls, vanity, ceiling, and trim. Or paint your cat. I don’t know, you do you. But if you get it right, there will be a great reward. And if you really, really hate it? Well, you can always repaint. Which is admittedly soul crushing, so I hope you don’t have to. But the point being that paint is largely reversible.

Largely, but not always. So think carefully before you decide to paint over your varnished woodwork or exposed brick. And also remember this: unless you are in a low grade rental where you are painting lemons to make lemonade? Please do your homework and adhere to good painting practices. Tape things off, use a drop cloth and quality brushes, set up good project lighting, and prep those surfaces just like they tell you to on YouTube. Otherwise you may have just made matters worse, and that sort of defeats the purpose.

Are you ready to up the ante? Because there is a whole other paint world out there and it goes by the name of epoxy. Let me first say that these paints are tricky to work with. There are lots of ways to go wrong, and if you are using them be sure to crack a window. But it might be worth it because these paints, when used correctly, can do crazy things.

They can refinish a bathtub, transform a linoleum counter or maybe cover a granite that you hate. It can change your avocado green appliances to white, or visa-versa if that’s your thing. It can paint over tile, concrete, and enamel. And it can definitely paint your garage floor because that’s where these paints originally came into fashion. I haven’t seen a car painted with it yet, but I’m keeping my eyes peeled.

But like I said there are lots of ways to go wrong. So much so that I don’t go near it myself. I hire professionals for the tricky stuff because I have zero tolerance for a flubbed project. But you DIYers always amaze me. I saw on Pinterest that one woman used epoxy paint to change the color of her kitchen counter while (get this) her baby was napping. I mean hmmmm on that one too. But she seemed happy and the pictures looked nice. I hope she cracked a window.

I’ve used it professionally to give new life to antique bathtubs and sinks. I saw one of my clients recently and asked her how her tub was holding up. She said it was great and that was five years ago. Online they say it can last ten to twenty years, so at that rate the finish might actually outlive the appliances that you just painted it with.

I frequent a restaurant where I've noticed they used it to change the color of the floor tile in their bathroom. I keep an eye on it to see how its holding up in this wet, high traffic area and so far it’s doing very well. I also went to a yoga studio that had cement floors which they covered in this beautiful epoxy blue. It was shiny and smooth and almost looked like glass. My yoga practice missed the wood underfoot, but it was pretty enough to make me come back.

So I’ve given you lots to think about. These are my inspirations, but you can google a ton more. Just don’t ignore that urge to make your space more you. Or to make something you spend time around look nicer. I get it, and me too.

Great rooms, there are so many of us that have them. Perhaps you have one because you own a large older home, with its elegant bones, grand rooms and high ceilings. Or maybe your great room came with a newer development-style home, where they have become a standard feature. Or perhaps neither. Perhaps you built a large addition, or created a room above your double garage. Regardless of how you got here, great rooms can be tricky to get right.

Although there are a few rules of thumb that might feel intuitive enough. For instance in a small space you’ll want smaller scale furniture that stands on legs so that it’s not solid to the floor. You’ll also use airy coffee tables with glass tops, and for the most part you’ll stay away from busy patterns and lots of color. Because in these small spaces, you want to minimize the chaos. Here you are creating that illusion of space.

So for the larger spaces, unsurprisingly, you do the opposite. This kind of room can handle large-scale furniture pieces, built-ins that go floor to ceiling, multiple seating zones, and a mixture of patterns and textures (done tastefully of course.) Because in these large spaces you are creating the illusion of intimacy.

But before you get caught up in all that, you and your loved ones must first agree on how you envision using your great room space. Because the answer impacts what you put in there and how you set it up.

One common scenario is the ultra-casual family space where the large-screen tv is anchored front and center. Perhaps you have young kids who need a place to jump and climb and play. And when you all gather or entertain, you are enjoying a movie or watching a game with friends. You want a couch comfy enough for you and your dog to nap on, and sturdy enough to withstand your kids creating a fort out of its cushions.

Great rooms like these? Bring on the giant u-shaped, super-squishy sectional sofa and a tv that is bigger than the state of Rhode Island. Because here, comfort and durability are king. Heck, even bring in wall-to-wall carpeting if that’s your thing, but also consider some built-ins to store the toys and games and family photo albums. If you have enough room for two seating zones, maybe the second zone has foosball or holds a craft table. But that tv will be the focal point of the room, and there is absolutely no shame in that.

I still ponder the wisdom behind the expensive armoire’s that we bought to house our back-in-the-day elephant sized televisions. Yes, it did hide that tv, but then there was the problem of the elephant sized armoire…. So, yes! Put that television front and center and be glad we now have flat screens. (I mean, we even have flat screens that really and truly look like framed artwork when not in use.) But spend the money to mount them properly because those dangling black cords are the worst.

Here’s one last tip on those squishy sectional sofas though. DO splurge on something high quality with durable fabric in a sensible color to hide the wear. The high-quality sofas use fabrics that clean up better, and some of them have guarantees to boot. But DON’T splurge on the down cushions. Because after a few busy years those cushions will get soft enough to gobble you up when you sit down. And, trust me, a gracious exit from one of those when you’re sporting your favorite jean skirt? Well, it’s just not possible. Never mind your elderly great aunt. For her you’ll need to pull together a search party.

But we are not all suited to that kind of all-encompassing casual living. Some of us feel most comfortable in rooms that are a little more buttoned up. Here is another common scenario. Sure you want to be able to sit in your great room and watch the news or catch up on the game, but you really want that room to be more multi-purpose and conversation centered. And yes you like to entertain, but maybe for your bookclub or for dinner with a few friends. Here, your fireplace may be your focal point, or if you’re lucky enough, your view. Instead of a sectional, perhaps you use two facing sofas with some nice upholstered chairs. And you anchor in your floor plan with an area rug and some accent lighting.

And speaking of floor plans, this may possibly rock your world, but not much of your furniture in a room this size will be touching the walls. So it’s different than the living room you had in your first apartment. Also you may have so much space you will need a second zone. But my advice is this: get going with your main zone first and figure the rest out later.

So for starters, don’t even think about the walls or zones. Take the furniture you have and focus on how it relates to itself. When you’ve gathered it all together, do your guests have a surface nearby to rest their drink? Can everyone reach the snacks? Can the people sitting across from you easily participate in a nearby conversation? Do you have enough flexible seating around (like square ottomans stored under a sofa table) to cover you for a larger crowd? And how does your furniture all look together?

All that is the important stuff. And when you’re done there might be quite a bit of space left over. But live with it for a week or two. Sometimes the concept of extra space can take time to get used to. Once you embrace the idea of it, you can fill in the empty areas prudently. It doesn’t always pay to rush to get it done.

What are other tips for making that large space feel warm and inviting? Well, there are tons of course. You can eat up some of that visual space with paneled walls, wallpaper, textiles, layered window treatments, a signature piece of furniture, large potted plants, paint and don’t forget lighting. Not all those things all at once of course, but you get the idea. Plus the internet is always there to help. And quite possible your great aunt as well. Just look for her between the couch cushions.

A Ghost of Christmas Past

When I was a kid my mother loved Christmas. I see now it was fitting because Carolyn liked sparkly things all year round and she kind of lived in this world with fairy sprites and earthen spirits. “Isn’t it terrible,” she once said, “how every Christmas we chop down all those majestic pines in the prime of their lives?” I was next to my older sister and I watched her eyes narrow. She knew when a storm was brewing. ”Wouldn’t you rather,” she asked with a big smile, “have a Christmas twig? Something that fell naturally to the ground, that we would give a second life to in our living room?”

Without even moving my head, I stole another look at my sister. Because she already knew what was just starting to dawn on me. Our parents just didn’t fit in. I mean, we were new in town, just starting to make friends, and couldn’t we PLEASE just have a normal tree like everyone else?? But we knew that Carolyn’s question wasn’t really a question. Our fate had already been determined. 

I tried making the best of it though. “Okay,” I said, “I’ll look for the twig.” We lived on a wooded lot and I though it would be easy enough, but I came home despairing. All the twigs I found were crumpled on one side, or too small, or too prickly to even touch. And besides that, they were TWIGS!

“Don’t worry,” my mother said cheerfully. “Your father will take care of it.” My father was not a tall man, but he was compact and strong. On any given day he might find my mother either mildly entertaining or completely exasperating. And thinking about it now, I’d say he felt that way about most things. But sure enough, a few days later I spotted him out the back window. 

He was at the edge of a bank of trees struggling to pull the stump end of our Christmas twig beyond the branches of its neighboring pines. His face was red and he kept losing his footing until he dug his heels in and gave that twig a final, mighty tug. It broke free suddenly, which threw him down hard. I winced behind the window as I saw him cursing. But even worse, as he picked himself up and collected his tools I realized that he was holding a small saw. A SAW? Weren’t we supposed to be saving the majestic pines? Well how about those plucky young saplings? Weren’t their stories just as tragic? I knew better than to mention it, but my mother ended up seeing it too. I caught her having a quiet moment with that twig, and when I asked what she was doing she said she was just thanking it for it’s service.

Regardless, we propped that tree up in a bucket in our living room. We sprayed some fake snow on it, wrapped a blanket around the base, strung it with lights and silver tinsel, and added our odd assortment of ornaments. And honestly, it wasn’t so bad. My sister never really came around, but I grew to like it. But I’ve got some of my mother in me. Anything strung up with fairy lights and dangled with sparkly ornaments can’t be all bad. And now, with all the twinkle that marks this holiday season, I think of Carolyn frequently. 

Jumping ahead about twenty-five years, I realize my own tree expeditions were marked with strife of their own. For a number of years we went to a tree farm to find our perfect tree. (You see Carolyn? They replace them!) But getting four kids to agree on anything was difficult in the cereal aisle, and just impossible when the stakes were so high. And did I say perfect tree? I really meant that any old tree would do. And thank goodness I felt that way because decision by committee does not always reap the finest results. Just ask my cat we collectively named Meatball.

And our trees? Oh, we had some real clunkers. Once, we found a large tree at the farm and out of desperation just chopped the top off of it and dragged it home. (Shhhh… I think that’s Carolyn rolling in her grave.) It seemed like a good idea at the time, but leaving behind that butchered half-tree just didn’t feel right. And when we got the other half home it sat squatly in our living room looking more like a shrub than a majestic pine.

Another year, we unwittingly bought a tree that, on day two, began aggressively losing it’s needles and rejecting water. Every time I walked by I’d hear that cartoon-like tinkle-tinkle-tinkle of the needles hitting the wrapped presents below. I hauled that thing out bright and early on December 26th, and with that final effort it was practically naked on the curb. Where it bore a troubling resemblance to the Christmas twig of my past. 

The last few trees we got while I was still married came from the farm stand down the road. Just me and my ex meeting after work. A fist bump to mark the occasion. So easy! The kids had lost interest. They were at the stage where they wanted Christmas to just magically appear in the living room, all dressed up and ready for action. And so that’s what we did.

But you know what? I loved all those trees, even the twig. I'd dressed them up in the holiday sparkle, sit next to them while anticipating the season, and even took quiet moments to thank them for their service. 

I’m a designer, but I’ve never really had a designer tree. Do I have words of advice as to how you can create your designer holiday? Well, I suppose I do, and you'll find them below. But honestly, it just doesn’t matter. Just sparkle it up, add your own messy mix of love and tradition, hug your mom close if she’s still alive, and set that bar low for what you take on with the rest of the family. Just be there, and the rest will follow.

Decorating Tips


• Too much stuff? Reign it in! No one likes a room that feels cluttered and chaotic. So choose some, and save some others for for the following year.



• Focus on a few locations and do them up big. Maybe it’s your mantle, your dining room table, your half bath (always fun), and your patio table which you will light up. Having a few areas of WOW is better than spreading all your stuff out evenly.



• Establish a design theme, not just for your tree, but for your whole home. Perhaps you focus on red lights, gold balls and votive holders, and you showcase your fabulous collection of snowglobes. Stick with that theme for all locations, and then change it up next year.



• Don’t forget your ceiling. Do something unexpected! Hang branches topped with some out-of-the-can snow, or dangle home-made snowflakes, or golf balls. Anything goes!



• Curate your own string of lights. For instance, you can swap out every fourth bulb to be a different color. It’s a nice way to add some color without overwhelming. 



• Ornaments are not just for trees. Try them in glass bowls or tall vases, lay them down your table runner, hang them from your candelabra. 



• Get the whole family involved. No designer display is worth it if little hands can’t participate. Or if you are displaying only meaningless items you picked up at HomeGoods. The best displays are from the heart!

Almost twenty years ago, my then-husband and I were house shopping. We went to an Open House where I promptly fell in love with a crazy fixer-upper. It was originally built in 1750 and early on it had been split in half, added onto, and moved to a few different locations in town. It had narrow hallways, a gazillion little rooms, and a full family of squirrels living under the floorboards in the attic. The floorpan was wonky and it was a little disorienting to walk through. The type of place that makes you want to leave a trail of breadcrumbs.

Well we bought that crazy house anyway. We renovated it, and certainly improved on the floor plan, but it remained a quirky house. It was just in its bones. It reminds me though, that wrestling with tight quarters is not an uncommon problem in New England. These parts are loaded with antique homes. And even if yours isn’t an antique, you may still struggle with wishing that you had more space. With this in mind, I offer a few words of advice.

First off, remember that initial impressions matter. If, when you enter a home you are immediately met with a series of cramped, over-cluttered or over-furnished rooms – your brain latches on to that and says “this is a cramped space.” Even if the home eventually opens up to comfortable family room in the back. It’s just too late. That tricky brain of yours has already mailed in its verdict.

So prioritize opening up that floor plan. It will take working with a professional, but get some sight-lines going so you can see from one room into the next. Broaden some doorways, open up a staircase wall, heck, take down other walls too. Be bold and you shall be rewarded. And, oh yes, definitely remove doors that don’t need to be there. It’s amazing how many times I hear myself suggest that. I mean, most of us just don’t need a door to the living room.

With all of that work you just did to open up your walls, your floors may take a hit. But don’t sweat it. Work with a professional to patch them up as best they can. Sometimes that means they can weave in the new wood perfectly with the old. But even if they can’t, (wide pine floors are hard for instance) I don’t usually get hung up on the patches. You can minimize their impact by staining all your floors when you refinish them. But I think patched floors sometimes just tell the story of the house and are not that big of a deal.

My second words of advice: inches matter. You’ve just addressed the big stuff, now it’s time to focus on the little stuff. Because it’s a series of small changes that will amount to the larger change you are searching for in your small-scale home. For instance, assess your clutter.

Now, I personally like a warm home that is populated with mementos unique to the people that live there. I am also well aware that we are messy humans and we need junk drawers and a counter to drop our mail and keys on. But that being said, keep in mind that you trying to create the illusion of space. So move the stacks of bills to the office and eliminate the random gee-gaws from HomeGoods. Display only meaningful items. It’s a good rule of thumb for all of us.

Where else do inches matter? Well, consider your window treatments. You would be surprised how much “visual space” heavy curtains can take up in a small room. Also, you’ve now got those great sight-lines going, maybe you want to use one privacy method for all of them. In small houses sometimes simple, consistent window solutions make the most sense. I like ones that sit nice and tidy inside the window jambs, like blinds or shutters or even cafe curtains. And an added bonus is that your exterior view will look great with that consistency as well.

And finally, here are a few words about your furnishings. Small spaces like furniture on legs. Like dining sideboards, and tv stands, and couches (just 3-inches will do.) For similar reasons, small spaces also like glass. Perhaps for your coffee table or your end tables. You want that feeling of airy-ness around your furniture. And with that said, please don’t fill every corner of the room with wobbly tables that you may just put a plastic succulent on. Only include the furniture that has a purpose.

But balance that advice with this advice: always consider storage. So yes, get a sideboard on legs (5-8 inches is fine) but also make sure it’s got the cabinets and drawers you need. You can’t do this with your glass coffee table of course. But do it where it makes sense. Because your small-scale home has no business housing frivolous pieces of furniture that don’t offer you the double duty benefit of added storage.

Your bonus topic is color. There are so many rules of thumb out there about color in small spaces. And honestly, I don’t subscribe to any of them. I’ve seen rich colors work in small spaces and I’ve also seen the benefits that a light neutral can bring. So you do you, just get samples and swatch, swatch, swatch until you find what works.

But in small spaces, especially those with open sight-lines into other rooms, you want to reduce this feeling of chaos. Because, chaos is a close cousin to cramped. So I do tend to go more neutral on the walls in a smaller home, and handle my pops of color carefully. Like a jewel green mudroom, or a black island, or baby blue built-in bookshelves. Or even a purple couch. Yes, color is BACK baby, and I love it! But for small homes the biggest priority is making them feel open, welcoming and livable.

I’ve been visiting a certain lake house for many years now. A close friend first hosted me there when I was in my twenties. Her mom was still alive and her six siblings zig-zagged in and out around me. There was water skiing, sunset cruises and farm-stand dinners with all of us gathered around a very long tavern table. The scene shifted as my friend and I each got married, and then shifted again when we had children, and shifted again when we each got divorced. Sadly, last winter my friend’s mother died, and I had my last visit there a few weeks ago prior to the house being sold.

All these transitions… it’s just how life unfolds. A series of “before’s” and then “after’s.” By definition, home renovations tend to create an after. They are frequently the response to life-changing before's, like a move, or a new addition to the family, or even something like a fire (although I hope not.) Long before I come to the scene, these after’s have been planned, saved-for and dreamt about for months or even years. And hurray, I can help them get it all done. What could be better, right? But the process can be long and disruptive, and we are messy humans - our emotions don’t always follow a linear path.

I just helped a client downsize. She’d been in the large home she raised her family in for a long time, the last chunk of it as a single woman. And as much as she loved the house, it became a heavy load. So she bought an amazing condo. It’s a converted church with twenty-five foot arched ceilings, giant pillars, and untouched details like the stained glass in her mahogany foyer. She loved it right away, and I helped her to customize this new space so it was as warm and inviting as her old.

She is very happy there, to be sure. But I honestly think the process left her with a little PTSD. Closing up shop on that family home of thirty years was painful. It was time, and it was what she wanted, but it was a lot of work and there were a lot of memories and the process was both exhausting and painful. And then renovating her new space was tough too. She shuffled between the houses of friends and airbnb’s for over eight weeks. She feared she wasn’t the anchor her kids needed her to be, and her life just felt upside-down.

But hey, (you might ask) couldn’t she just keep her eye on the prize and suck it up? Sure, and I think she did. But, (you may also say) that’s a first-world problem, I mean boo-hoo! Right again, and she’d be the first to agree. But change still gets to be hard. Even much anticipated change. Even change that you had to do backflips to create, both logistically and financially.

I have another client who is moving in to the home of her youth. She and her husband bought the home from her mother and, with me, she made very careful renovation decisions. We did a lot to that home and it’s beautiful. Along the way she juggled budget, function, and comfort to create a loving environment for her kids, her aging live-in mother and who knows maybe her father too.

And now it’s time for her to enjoy the new space. (The end zone! She’s sailing into the end zone with the ball safely cradled in her arms!) And yet I sense her having trouble settling. Are the colors too light? Is the floor too dark? And we mull it all over together, but what I think she really needs is to rest her head on my shoulder so I can tell her, “You have done enough, my child. Now go live.” But we’ll see. Maybe an accent wall will help too.

I have yet another client that is staring down the barrel of a grueling renovation process with nothing but good spirits. They live in a diamond-in-the-rough house and have invested heavily in all the thankless tasks a neglected house demands, like HVAC, septic systems, electrical work, etc. All that, and yet they lived all through covid and up until now with semi-functioning bathrooms, a kitchen that doesn’t make sense, and a home that just doesn’t feel like… well, home. 

This project was indeed a multi-tentacled monster that needed to be wrestled to the ground. But we did it, and phase one of a three-phase construction plan is in play. So far, the joy of seeing progress is beating out the significant disruption they are enduring. And I so appreciate their good spirits for this moment in time. But I also give them a full allowance to have their moments of despair as the process continues.

And what may catapult them into that state? Well, it could be anything. It could be the dust that ends up on their pillow one morning. It could be an Uncle casually remarking that “we didn’t spend that kind of money in our day.” It could be everyone needing to share one bathroom on a tightly scheduled morning. It could be a deep-rooted feeling that they are not deserving. Who knows? We are all messy humans.

What I do know is that change is hard. So be kind to yourselves, you home renovators, planners, and DIY-ers. Leave yourselves space to experience the mixed bag that comes with even an eagerly anticipated renovation project. Come rest your heads on my shoulder, and I’ll tell you it’s ok to feel that way. But keep the faith too. You'll get there, and when you do it will be pretty amazing.

As an interior designer I spend a fair amount of time in building supply stores, one of which is the tile store. And as I chat with my sales rep and make my selections, I sometimes turn a corner and bump into a shopper with that deer-in-the-headlights look as they stare down a wall of tile options. I know that look well, because it’s me when my daughter drags me to the super sale at Nordstrom Rack. I mean, where on God’s green earth does one even begin? Nordstrom Rack has got me beat, but tile I can help you with.

If you're in the market to purchase some tile, I offer you my standard rules of thumb. Go to a reputable tile store, make sure you make an appointment, and if possible try not to go on a weekend. Communicate your price range up front and if you are on a budget, be wary of getting distracted by all the eye candy at the front of the store. Your tile will probably be towards the back.

Now I as offer you this sage advice I know that some of you, even while nodding your heads in agreement with me, are at the very same time plotting their shopping excursion to one of those cash-and-carry warehouse super stores. Some of you cannot be deterred. The lure of the potential savings is just too much to bare. And honestly - those stores aren’t all bad. The prices are low, and one nice benefit is you can leave there with tile samples in hand to prop up in your bathroom or kitchen. And if you are doing a job that only needs one kind of tile (like a kitchen backsplash) then it could very well be worth the trip.

But for larger projects with multiple selections needed (like a bathroom or two,) all I can say is yeesh! They’ve got genuine stone on one side of the store, and the accent tile I want is about a quarter mile away on the other side of the store. So pulling together a design is challenging. And the customer service is relatively non-existent, so you will most likely forget something important, like a Schluter edge (more on that later) or grout of the proper type and color. I always say about a bathroom design, the devil is in the details. So for my money, what I’ve potentially saved in dollars I’ve lost in time and headaches, so I call the whole thing a wash. But you might feel differently. If you do go, remember to wear your sneakers, bring a water bottle, and leave a trail of breadcrumbs.

So clearly I like an official tile shop where I work with humans who think about nothing but tile all day long. They help me with my selection process, and if your are in that overwhelmed state you will find them indispensable on that front. Plus they have tables to lay everything out on. And they are thoughtful about suggesting products, like a good sealer for your stone tile for instance. Sometimes I bring a swatch book and choose a wall color too while I’m there with everything laid out. And yes, they will get me the right Schluter edge.

Here’s the low-down on those Schluter edges. They are a little metal edging strip that tucks around the edge of your tile. So say you are tiling the walls of your bathroom to chair-rail height. You don’t want to look at the unfinished edge of the tile, so you top it with a  Schluter edge to finish it off. It’s minimalist and clean. You can get it to match your tile and have it disappear, or you can use it as a design statement in, say, brass to match your brass faucet. Anyway, it’s a small, subtle thing that prevents a big ugly thing, which is otherwise known as bull-nose tile.

But all that said, before you go shopping you must do your homework. Take measurements and sketch out your room and the walls, on graph paper if you’ve got it. Include the wall heights and window and door sizes if you will be tiling around them. And for bonus points, calculate some approximate square footage so you can quickly run some numbers to see if you can afford what you've fallen in love with.

A more fun homework assignment, but equally important, is gathering inspiration photos. Take some time to pull pictures from magazines or to create a Pinterest page. Focus in on how other people handle niches, or patterns, or feature walls, or the new ways they are stacking that subway tile. And remember, figuring out what you don’t like is almost as good as pinpointing what you do. Hey, it’s the wild west of tile options out there. Do what you can to cull that herd.

When thinking about budget, keep in mind that you can spend a little more on the surfaces that have less square footage. So maybe you want to highlight one wall of your walk-in shower, above the bench. That can be the focal point for the whole room and it may be worth the splurge for something stunning, and you can use less expensive tile on the other walls. In smaller bathrooms, maybe it’s the floor tile that you spend a little more on. Are you building a shower niche? Because you can almost always afford something special there. But make sure it matches your design. Sometimes I use niches as focal points, and other times I just want them to disappear.

Keep in mind that in most cases the cost of your tile is a very small fraction of your overall construction budget. The larger amount of tile-related money is spent on installation. So don’t be blindly eliminating tile options just because it's your budget bathroom. It’s one of the most visible parts of your renovation, and you are already paying your installer no matter what you put in. Run the numbers. Sometimes your splurge tile only amounts to a few hundred dollars more.

And that's a wrap on tile I guess. Did you think I was going to tell you what exact tile to buy? I’m sorry to disappoint. But I know you’ll come up with something great. Hey, even someone like me can come up with one winner at Nordstrom Rack, and I don't even have an inspiration photo! So get out there intrepid designer, you’ve got this.

This article was originally published in The Manchester Cricket

Confessions of a springtime scavenger


I have a long-time friend that lives alone in a beautiful house. He’s got great taste, and his house is nicely decorated with a sort of masculine starkness. He does this by design, not because he’s a cold person. But there is something about that starkness that makes me show up on his doorstep with something alive in my hand. And it can be anything. A pumpkin, some grass in a pot from the pet store, evergreen clippings in a jar. I’m not being critical when I do it - it’s just an offering. And I’d never really given it much thought until he mentioned it to me. But I now see it’s a pull I have that runs deep.

Which brings us to spring. After a long winter of store-bought orchids and pre-potted succulents I can finally return to my first joy which is foraging outside. And oh yes, the season has begun. I’ve got some early shell-shocked forsythia already in a vase near my radiator. So far they are still just a humble pile of sticks but I root for them every day. And those brave crocuses? I’ve already snipped a few for my windowsill. I try to be respectful. I don’t hack off an entire grouping in a prominent location. But, hey, those little guys growing under a bush or in the odd parking lot? I think they’re fair game, and I’ll go ahead thin out that cluster a bit.

I’ve realized my foraging instincts go way back. As a teen, on mother’s day, I once brazenly pulled my car over to hack off handfuls of daffodils from someone’s front yard. From someones front yard!! I left the motor running and clipped haphazardly, like it was a crime scene. Which I guess it was. Yeesh, so embarrassing. I remember a couple a cars honking as I did it, but I just gave them a big, entitled, what’s-your-problem glare like only a teen can do. (Oh, the karma!) My mother accepted the flowers quietly. I think she knew better than to ask too many questions.

So I know it’s spring when I slip a pair of scissors into my glove compartment. (Don’t worry, I’m reformed. Your daffodils are safe with me.) But I have been known to pull over on a dirt road to clip a few daisy’s or, my favorite, Queen Ann’s Lace later in the summer. I’m in the woods a lot with my dog, but I try not to disrupt too much there. There are so many brave little sprouts that I just can’t bare to disturb. For instance, pretty soon these beautiful flowers that look like nature’s orchids will appear. I don’t know if they are officially protected or anything, but I do my part anyway. And those unfurling ferns are another miracle. So much power and beauty packed into that tight little spiral. I can’t quite believe people eat them.

So I guess mostly I like to enjoy my nature in nature. But I’ll still snip a few budding branches here and there and see if I can grow some greenery at home. Flowers are great, but even just forcing the leaves brings me joy.

But when not outside, I can still appreciate the more traditional route of a store bought plant. And with these early spring months we get a wonderful new in-flux. Those mini hydrangea bushes pack a big punch and last a while. And even the common pansy makes me smile. Pussy willows make an appearance near the checkout at Trader Joe’s, as well as some cherry blossom branches if you’re lucky. Bring them on, all of them. It’s been a long winter.

What to do with all this bounty when you get it home? Well, for starters, come to my house and use one of my gazillion vases. I’m not much for clutter so I keep culling that herd, but it relentlessly multiplies despite my best efforts. I’ve got pitchers, antique glassware, dollar store hurricane glasses, and murky bottles unearthed from the garden. It’s an equal opportunity obsession and I really like to think that I need them all. So I put the little ones on my sill. I’ll mix and match the medium ones in a line down my dining room table. And I’ll put those architectural branches from the woods into a large pitcher. The store bought plants? I’ll strip those of their tinfoil lining, and plop them into something prettier too.

But does all this talk of “foraging” make you a little uncomfortable? Does it make you feel like you should bring your annuals in at night to protect them from teenage me? And that really I should be leaving nature in its untouched state right where it is? Well… that would all be fair. My sister is sort of in awe of my habits, and also a little horrified. I collected a pinecone off the pavement while visiting in SanDiego and she was worried about me getting through TSA with it. For real.

So we all have our stuff. We all have our own standards of risk versus reward. My foraging tips me solidly into the reward category, so I’m going to keep at it. Go ahead, call me a rebel. But if you do, you might want to guard your daffodils.

This article was originally published in The Manchester Cricket

Beds in the Belfry

I remember the first house I owned when my kids were young. It was small. And my kids were at that stage where they just all seemed so BIG. Not them really, it was all their stuff. Their Lego models and their Cruise Ship Barbie monstrosities. We had an attic with a rope in the ceiling that I needed to throw my full weight into to pull down. There was one light up there on a pull string and only a few pieces of plywood to walk on. It was not a place any normal person would want to spend any time. But when I got up there, the din of the kids got that little bit farther away, and I’d look around and think, “There must be some way I can harness this space.”

Well, in that scenario, there just was not. The pull down ladder meant there was no good space to install regular stairs. And the floor joists were built strong enough for storage, but not for living. Plus I could only stand up along the apex of the roof, so I would have been forever going back and forth, but never able to go side to side. But a girl can dream right? At the end of the day we just needed a bigger house, which we eventually got. And let me tell you, I renovated the heck out of the attic in that one.

So how do you know if your attic is even a candidate for expansion? Well, sometimes there are easy ways to know. For instance, victorian homes with their walk-up attics are usually a no-brainer. Their stairs are are already in place and their roof lines are high and varied, offering up all that quirky charm we associate with attic renovations. But lots of us have pull down stairs, and once we’re up there we’re looking at an uninspiring long triangle of space with a window at each end. Those attics are a little tougher to figure out.

One of the most common deal breakers for an attic renovation are the stairs. Real stairs, not the pull down kind. Stairs need to adhere to building codes, and so they tend to take up a lot of room. Especially when you factor in the headroom you need when you are standing at the top of them.

Spiral staircases are an option to consider. They come as kits that you can order online or through a building supply store for a few thousand dollars. They take up much less space, but you need to decide if they fit the aesthetics and functionality of your home. And you also need to confirm that you can get your furniture and supplies up those tricky little triangle steps, because nothing is more disappointing than a sofa that won’t fit through the doorway.

The second most common dealbreaker is headroom. You can look up the building code, but as a guideline they want more than half of your space to have a ceiling height of 7-feet, and some of that needs to land over the top of the stairs so you can stand up as you enter. What do you do if you don’t have that? Well that’s when you get into dormers, assuming they are within your budget.

Dormers are great because they give you more walking-around space, windows and light. Plus they create great pockets of space to house a bed or a couch. Additionally, they also add visual interest to your ceiling, so those long-triangle attics can really benefit from them.

But let’s assume your attic checks out for renovation. Now what? Well, I think these projects come in two categories. The first one is to renovate that space to the same level of finish that the rest of your house enjoys. You’ll do this if you want to use that space as a full time office or if you have bedrooms up there.

If so, you might look at redoing the attic stairs which are typically narrow with walls on both sides. Sometimes you can remove one of those walls, widen the stairs and install a railing with balustrades which will ideally match the stairs in the rest of your house. You’ll insulate, and put in plenty of lighting. You’ll heat and cool that space by expanding your existing system into a new zone, or perhaps with a mini-split. You may install wood floors (if you don’t mind the noise from below) and even a bathroom. But it’s still an attic, so lean-in. Attics like quirky bookcases and wood paneling. Have fun with it.

But the other way to re-do an attic, is to look at it as found space. Maybe it will be an overflow playroom that the kids will only need while they are very young. Or perhaps it will house your extended-stay guests that come just for the summer. With these types of goals you have a lot more flexibility with the kind of finishing you might want to do.

Maybe you don’t insulate at all, and just spray paint the whole thing white. Maybe you pop in a window unit for air conditioning in the summer and just close the attic off in the winter. Maybe you update your electric with more lighting and outlets, but leave it rustic with the wires exposed. Maybe you just carpet the whole thing - uneven floor boards and all. Honestly, if it looks clean and loved and there are no spiders?? Well, there is a whole lot of forgiveness that comes with a high quality mattress, crisp linens, wifi and privacy.

What else? Oh gosh, there’s tons. There are sleeping berths and reading nooks and crazy angled bathrooms. There is storage built into the knee walls, skylights, and window seats. But most importantly there is a certain amount of peace that you get just from having that extra space. But if you call that space your own? Take my advice and don’t invite that Barbie and her crazy friends from the cruise ship. They’ll keep you up all night.

This article was originally published in The Manchester Cricket.

Get Cooking with Bold Colors


I recently noticed I haven’t been asked to design a completely white kitchen in a while, and I can’t say I’ve missed it. I’m not knocking them though. They have a classic beauty that will stand the test of time. And they also leave lots of room for a pretty backsplash or colorful artwork or even just your colorful self standing in one. But bold is back and it’s coming to a kitchen near you.

Where have I been going bold in my kitchen projects? Well, contrast is “in” so I’ve been using much more black. And when I say black I really mean colors that “read” as black. So it can be a genuine black, but it can also be a very deep gray, green or blue. I’ll use that dark color on a kitchen island, or maybe on all the lower cabinets, or even on the range hood.

Remember though, when practicing this loosey-goosey mixing of cabinet colors and textures: beware of the 50/50 mix. Your kitchen should have one main “color” (paint or wood) and your accents should be, well exactly that… accents. Use them sparingly.

It’s like sprinkling pomegranate seeds on top of your salad. Well, hey, isn’t that a nice surprise? But if you then ate your chicken stuffed with pomegranate and cooked some pomegranate rice and poured pomegranate wine - well then it’s no longer a refreshing surprise, right? So, same with your kitchen. Minus the seeds.

That said, there are also stunning kitchens that use just one dark and moody color for all the cabinets, especially those in homes with open floor plans where you can balance that use of contrast into other areas of the house.

I am currently completing a renovation that includes a large pantry, all of which I’m painting black. Open shelves, lower cabinets, upper cabinets - all of it. It’s even got black soapstone counters and a dark jewel-toned green for the backsplash. There is a window in there (also trimmed in black) that offers some natural light, and I over-lit the space with 3” recessed lights on dimmers. I know it all sounds crazy on paper, but wow it’s looking amazing! And believe it or not, it’s really not too dark in there.

The challenge of working with these dark, rich colors is to not rob the house of its serenity. But when handled properly they really won’t. Sure, we talk about “adding a pop of color to the island” but with these colors that island doesn’t really pop, it actually recedes right into the comfort of the other cabinets.

Where am I not using bold colors? On the kitchen walls. Unless they are the exact same color as the cabinets. Otherwise, there usually just isn’t enough wall there to to get the bang that you want. And even worse - the wall space available is usually chopped up. It’s surrounding a window, or a strip between the cabinet and the door trim. Lots of odd skinny spaces. I usually pick something fairly close to the cabinet or trim-color for the walls.

Another element that softens up spaces and feels right at home in the kitchen is wood. With its natural tone, wood brings a very nice organic warmth to a space that at times can feel a bit clinical with all of our appliances and countertop gadgets. I’ve been using it as the material for open shelves, or accent cabinetry, or in the ceiling. Wherever you put it, let’s celebrate its return. Because wood is a workhorse. It hides fingerprints, and doesn’t chip or show wear as quickly as the painted finishes do.

The wood I like isn’t the knotty pine in your grandmother’s kitchen. Nor is it the ubiquitous over-shellacked oak you had in your first apartment. The wood I like comes with a matte finish and sometimes a light neutral color. It reads more neutral-tan, than brown or espresso. And more Scandinavian than American Colonial. It can be crisp and clean, or weathered and reclaimed. But either way, I love the feel of what it brings to a space.

Does all this talk make your toes curl a little bit with discomfort? Fear not you white kitchen lovers - there is room for all of us in the pool. I don’t use these colors all the time. I’m working on a beautiful converted carriage house with a ridiculous amount of personality in all of its original details. It’s got oval windows and barn doors and transomes and arched windows. I’m letting all that detail do the talking and am recommending a family of very light neutrals. Bold colors here would make the home feel a little too busy.

As a designer, my job is to offer you guidance. To advise you of the pros and cons of your inclinations. To inform you of what’s in or what’s out. And to make recommendations with all that in mind. But the only person that really matters in the end, is you. Ok, and maybe your spouse. And to a lesser extent even your kids. But going with your gut is almost always the right start.

So if you’re not a black pantry person? Great to know! Who cares? We’ll just do something else awesome. But can we keep some of the wood shelving.?

This article was originally published in The Manchester Cricket.

Winter Session

Well that holiday sparkle is over and it’s back to my old salty self and business as usual in New England. But it’s a funny space, isn’t it, these bleak and unpopular months that land between the charms of spring and fall. Let’s call it our Winter Session. I know, it’s sort of a cute name to attach to the few months that are marked by such short daylight hours and often prohibitive weather. But it’s a good time to both hunker down and to try to get something done. So what are you doing for your Winter Session?

Historically for me, these were do-it-yourself days on the home front. To be fair, my ex did most of the DIY-ing. But I’m positive he would agree I was an invaluable resource when it came to my fabulous ideas and sound recommendations. Plus I did take our four kids out to a lot of movies and trips to Five Below to keep them out of his hair. But who’s counting, right? It’s a complex tale, as you young families know, and it’s filled with unsung heroes.

Anyway, what sort of projects did we (ok, mostly he) take on? Well I think the Winter Session is well suited to containable projects with attainable goals. By containable, I mean projects where you can shut a door at the end of the day to minimize the disruption to the rest of the house. And by attainable I mean a project that can be completed by the end of winter recess because come March that lawn isn’t going to fertilize itself now is it?

So a good candidate might be redoing a kids room for instance. Sure, you may have to double the kids up during the process, but all the reno mayhem can take place in one area, and come March there is no reason your kids shouldn’t be back to their proper rooms. Other good candidates? You can create a mudroom, or an office, or give your bathroom a facelift with new paint, hardware, and mirrors. In an isolated room, you can rip up that carpet and put down some hardwood, re-plaster a ceiling, or go ahead and paint, paint, paint. Trust me, it feels so good when it’s all done. And you’ll have at least 7-8 weeks of bliss before your loving child announces that they actually HATE that new paint color you just completed. Sigh. Try to ignore them.

What projects shouldn’t you take on? Well, anything that is part of your open floor plan. This is a tough time to refinish all your wood floors, or put in a new kitchen, or redo your only bathroom. And let’s face it, those aren’t your typical DIY projects anyway, you’ll probably be working with a contractor or some other building specialist. So if you schedule that work for the warmer months you’ll have options readily available that can help you cope. For example, in the spring you can send your kids outside to play for hours at a time. Also, you can set up an outdoor kitchen, take outdoor showers, go camping, even vacation while messy work is taking place. Even with a cute name, Winter Session can be a little grueling all on its own - no need to add flame to that fire.

But guess what? Winter Session is the perfect time to plan that larger project. If you use someone like me, you’ll learn that the bulk of the time I spend on your project is done in the planning phase, and you can do the same thing. By the time I’ve inconvenienced you by demolishing your kitchen, I’ve already ordered the cabinets, plumbing supplies, and tile. My construction documents are almost complete and I’ve even planned out where your towel bars will go. And what better time to do all that planning? Winter Session, of course.

But do not despair, you intrepid do-it-yourselfers. I know you are are a resourceful and scrappy bunch. There is still plenty of room for your energy even when other building professionals are involved. I always say to my clients, “Don’t worry, you will still be making lots and lots of decisions.” Because it’s all a big collaboration. Or a dance. Or even a short-lived family in a way. It’s a complex tale, and it’s filled with unsung heroes.

In closing, I have a final word on the humble towel bar. I plan where they go in advance so that I can have my builders “block” the wall behind the plaster with wood. That way the hardware gets drilled into wood instead of just plaster, because I’m pretty sure we’ve all wrestled with wiggly towel bars enough for one lifetime. Especially in a bathroom frequented by your children. They probably won’t like the hook you chose, but at least you know it will stay put.

This article was originally published in The Manchester Cricket.

Decorating Like a Designer

Here’s the good news about the holidays: there are so many “right” ways to decorate that there is no need to stress. As long as your home is filled with meaningful expressions of love, and you are happy with how it looks and more importantly how it makes you feel—then don’t change a thing. But some of us get a little restless from year to year and think it might be fun to try something new.

What do designers do when they want to change it up? Well, usually they start by mapping out the whole project before they even buy so much as a strand of tinsel. They identify the areas they want to decorate (some expected, some unexpected,) and then think globally to come up with some themes so those areas make sense to one another. Themes are really just a set of rules or guidelines for your design self to follow.

For instance, years ago two of my good friends threw a Christmas party. He was a car and motorcycle junky, and she was a designer. On their mantle she tastefully displayed natural elements she found in the woods, and he added match box cars that he had spray painted white. There were silver balls, glass icicles and lots of white candles. They gave their tree some fake snow and a silver garland, and more white matchbox cars, but they also mixed in the handmade ornaments from their pasts. Their colors were muted, their silver was their pop, and his cars made it all feel very personal.

When all was said and done, the decorations were somewhat minimal. But they chose their placement and their themes wisely and also (I’m sure) left lots of unused holiday decor up in the attic. Because approaching your home like a designer takes three things: creativity, commitment and restraint.

So First, Be Creative
Turn your decorating upside-down… literally. Think about your ceiling, and large hanging branches, and get your kids going on small cut-out snowflakes. Or if that’s too artsy and you’re loaded with ornaments, try a “more-is-more” aesthetic and double-stuff that tree and your mantle with every ornament you can find. Or try non traditional combinations like white gourds and strung cranberries with some purple mini-lights.

Honestly, anything goes. You may come up with a bah-humbug theme that could work. Or Scrabble. Or golf. We’re not launching a nuclear missile here, we’re just expressing ourselves through some temporary home decorating.

Next, Be Committed
Once you get your idea, do not waver. Sure, there will be some moans and groans about not highlighting Aunt Mabel’s yarn ornaments from the church fair. (Have I mentioned that bathrooms can be fun to decorate?) But if you’re trying out a theme, go all in. And have fun! Holiday decor has a built in expiration date, so it’s ridiculously low risk.

And Finally, Exercise Restraint
Oh yes, you will definitely need to leave some of your old and faithful holiday chotchki's right in the same tubs that you packed them up in last year. It’s ok. It’s not a death sentence for them, it’s really more like a vacation. And be thoughtful about where you decorate. Choosing a few areas that have a big impact is better than loading up every side table with a dancing Santa.

Oh, and while you’re doing all this? Order some take out. You’re not superhuman you know. And your relaxed presence during the holidays is the biggest gift of all.

This article was originally published in The Manchester Cricket.

Stuff Management
Stuff is a funny thing. On the one hand it makes us who we are, right? I mean, we are living people and accumulating a certain amount of things is just built into our existence. We have a set of basic human needs like shelter and comfort, and we needs tools to help us accomplish those things like appliances and computers. But we’re also sentimental and perhaps a little bit vain - we also like to collect our treasures. All totally normal. But there comes a point where you don’t own the stuff anymore because that stuff starts owning you.

Last weekend I traveled to Pittsburgh to clean out my father’s house. He passed a while ago, but his wife recently died so my sister and I traveled out to take care of his belongings. The house was packed. Head to toe, top to bottom. Not quite a hoarders house, but pretty darn close. You know how they talk about a spirit leaving the body and suddenly it’s revealed that the body is just a vessel for the spirit? Well, that Pittsburgh house felt a lot like that.

Because all these belongings (the unopened delivery boxes, the trash, the paperwork, even the unclaimed photo albums) just felt hollow and sad. I think especially so because the occupant clearly felt so strongly about collecting all those things. She sure sacrificed a lot to accumulate them. It was like she was looking for something, but I didn’t get the feeling that she ever found it. We were surrounded by her treasures, and yet for us, It was just an overwhelming pile of junk.

We stayed in a bleak little airbnb, and at night we walked by a house that had all these cheerful hot-air halloween figures bouncing around on the front lawn. “How cute!” we remarked. But in the morning light with their blow machines turned off, they were just a pile of dead soldiers. A flattened Halloween-Snoopy splayed right next to a crumpled Tyrannasaurus Rex. A crushed Baby-Yoda tucked in by his side. Perspective is a powerful thing.

So here we are with another holiday season barreling down upon us, and me with stuff on my mind. I remember Christmas when my kids were young. I’d wrap up the silliest stuff just because watching them rip off the wrapping paper brought me joy. But a few days after Christmas I would be deep into stuff-management. I mean where does it all go? It was my a holiday hang over. I actually had a bin in the basement that I called pergatory. I’d sneak their old toys down there to make room for the new, and if they weren’t missed in a few months, out they went.

One of my clients just bought the home she grew up in, so she’s knee deep in the process of emptying that house to renovate it. I have another client moving into their brand new house and they’re deep in the throws of procurement. It’s a natural cycle that I witness every day. But try looking at your attic or your basement with a fresh perspective. If you look around and it feels a little bit like… well Pittsburgh, then you need to take some action. Honestly you’ll rest easier at night if you do.

I suggest you play this game I made up called Pretend We Are Moving. It forces you into making some brutal decisions. No, I’m NOT keeping all those extra towels for the next carwash fundraiser. No, I’m NOT going to guilt my kids into taking that “perfectly good” used furniture. And No, I’m NOT keeping the remains of the cardigan I started knitting back in the 90’s for my then-husband. It’s tough but it gets easier as you go. Remember, all the junk in life can be divided into four piles: save, trash, donate, and not sure. So get sorting.

I have a friend who is a professional organizer and she’s got a method I like. She uses clear plastic tubs, all the same size, that she gets from a big box store. That way if you run out (which you will) you can go back and get more. Tubs that are the same size stack beautifully. And if they’re clear you can get a glimpse of what’s inside without opening them. Organize your stuff by category - so don’t freak out if some of your tubs are half full. It’s ok. It’s better to keep them organized with some room to grow anyway. Label the short sides, stack them up, and then give yourself a high five because that was some good work.

It’s not easy, keeping the upper hand on what seems to be a super-human force that drags us toward excessive accumulation. But it’s a battle worth fighting. If you don’t believe me, I’ll set you up with a visit to Pittsburgh.

This article was originally published in The Manchester Cricket.

Bathroom Issues

So, lucky you – you are renovating your bathroom! And, congratulations as well – you’ve nailed down a contractor (no easy feat these days) that will be starting in a few months. Now what?

Well, to start it’s important to have a comprehensive sense of what you want done. Things like: tub, shower or both? Niche or shelves? Vanity or console sink? Double or single? And how about lighting? The list can go on, but don’t worry, you don’t have to decide right now what any of these things will look like, you just need to know basically what’s going where. And only to the best of your ability at this early stage, you can always make changes of course. But the more accurate information your contractor has, the more accurate their quote will be.

So, create a Pinterest board, or flip through magazines. Scroll through pictures on the internet, and screen grab pictures on instagram. Take some pictures of your friend’s gorgeous bathroom and ask them about the decisions that they made. Think of this as any other research project you’ve taken on - like buying a vacuum or a new car. You familiarize yourself with the options, assess your priorities, narrow down your choices, and then make your decisions. Or maybe I should say your best guesses. It’s natural for your project to shift a bit as your design evolves.

Now that you know basically what’s going where, it’s time to think about your materials. One important thing to keep in mind these days is that there are still supply chain issues. So if you are shopping at a tile store or a plumbing supply house for instance, make sure you understand the lead times of the products you are interested in before you get too attached to them.

Personally, I start feeling a little squirrelly about a product once I hear they are back-ordered, or they are “not sure” of their delivery date, or if there is a chance they could get caught up in customs over seas. None of these are deal breakers fundamentally - but they do represent just more things that might go wrong. And all of your design decisions sort build on top of one another - so it’s not ideal to swap something out at the last minute.

In these kinda-post-covid times, I tend to order all my design-oriented building materials as soon as I can. I like to be able to call that contractor I hired and say, “Everything is in. When can you start?” I like to say it, and they like to hear it. It’s an assurance that your project will clip along without your contractor getting hung up waiting for stuff, and that situation is in everybody’s best interest.

And no conversation on materials is complete without discussing the big box stores. Big box stores have their place in any renovation project. They are at their best when you are purchasing their cash and carry merchandise because you walk in looking for something and (in theory) walk out carrying that item. They can also shine at the check-out counter because their prices are low. They are good for a seat-of-the-pants homeowner renovation because you can pop in at all hours to get what you’ve forgotten - assuming they have it in stock. But then there is lots of stuff you can’t get there. Like reliable customer service and design advice, or the ability to embrace your project as a whole and trouble shoot your needs with with you.

Additionally, there is the curse of that “look”. I can spot a big box bathroom right away, and I think lots of people can. That may not matter to you, but if it does, it presents a problem. And for the plumbing supplies especially, many of the brand names they carry have inferior parts inside. The manufacturers are pressured into a low price point that makes them trade a metal or a ceramic part for a plastic one. The price is low, but these items don’t last as long. And also, in general at the big box stores, the quality is skewed toward the budget purchaser, so the selection of higher quality merchandise is limited.

You can tell where I land. I’m a design professional and skilled at managing details, and selecting appropriate materials, and I still appreciate working with the other skilled professionals that are my sales reps. Their opinions really matter to me because they do this one thing all day long, whereas I’m doing lots of different things all day. So, if I’m pondering my tile choice for instance, and my sales rep thinks the scale is off on one of them, I really stop and listen. Sometimes I’ve got a vision they aren’t accounting for, but I have to say that lots of times they are just straight-up right. And I’m grateful they’ve pointed out whatever they did.

So me? I go to my trusted tile stores and my trusted plumbing supply showrooms. At the end of the day, there is just less to go wrong. And if your bathroom is part of a larger project with even more moving parts? Then all the more reason to minimize your risk. What you save on budget materials may cost you during installation or down the road in other ways.

Is doing it on a budget impossible then? Not at all. I put in budget bathrooms all the time using my trusted design resources. Even the nicest stores have their “entry level” brands. Just be very clear up front about the price range you are looking for and they will accommodate you.

But maybe you’re committed to chasing the absolute lowest price and you’re going rogue. So you place a partial order here and something else there, and you get some stuff online and also at the Christmas Tree Shop or Job Lots. I made purchases this way when I first started flipping houses as a side gig. But it takes a ton of organization to manage it all, and it was sometimes problematic during installation, and then oh what a nightmare for returns or warrantee issues. So I found I didn’t actually saved the money I thought I did and shifted my practices. But you might feel differently. So good for you, you shoestring design god - I love your spunk! But also, it ain’t for the faint of heart, so proceed with caution. You’ve been warned.

And to wrap this up, I’ll offer ten rapid fire bits of advice to help you with your material selections.

1 - Consider adding aging-in-place modifications, for yourself or for a loved one. It can be as easy as using doors that are a little bit wider, a curb free shower, and some blocking behind the tile to secure a grab-bar down the road.

2 - Niche’s can be really pretty, and are of course great for storage. I like dramatic shapes, like long or high rectangles with shelves.

3 - Plan for your towel bars - some blocking behind them will save you wiggly aggravation later on.

4 - Your bathroom fan is an under appreciated work horse - choose it wisely! It fights odor and more importantly mildew and condensation which are so tough on drywall and grout. Some fans have sensors that turn on and off automatically.

5 - Don’t forget to choose your grout at the tile store, it’s the easiest time to do it. Plus it can be an interesting design element.

6 - Don’t ignore the tile and grout sealing recommendations. It’s usually just once a year and it protects these materials from ground-in dirt. Plus try the new grouts that don’t need any sealing, but your natural stone still might.

7 - It’s nice for every house to have one tub if possible.

8 - Want to save some money by buying something online? Towel bars are a good option. But don’t go dirt cheap, you still get what you pay for.

9 - For your faucets, light fixtures and cabinet hardware, there are all kinds of crazy new finishes out there. Some golds are dangerously trendy, but black is classic. And some of the “natural bronze” colors are gorgeous. Satin nickel is now looking a little dated.

10 - No, no, no to bullnose tile. Yes, yes, yes to a Schluter edge. Just ask at the tile store.

And, hey, have fun out there! Work hard, plan hard, do your research, plan some more, ask around - and your bathroom will be amazing! Design is fun! Take it from me, I have the best job in the world.

– This article was originally printed in The Manchester Cricket.

Exterior Paint: One Big Happy Family

The heat, this summer, has been tough on all of us - but it can be particularly tough on your house’s paint job. Sure, I know in the spring you may optimistically think you can hold off just one more year, but by now your house may have you singing a different tune. But do not despair, houses get painted all the way into deep fall if the conditions are right. And after this summer you would think they’d have to be. 

So you’ve committed to repainting your home, and you’re up for a change. Now what? A good place to start is to step back and assess your house as a whole. What are you trying to accomplish? In general, you want to highlight your home’s strengths and minimize its weaknesses. And yes, I know that doesn’t sound like rocket science, but sometimes it can be trickier than you think.

What are your house’s strengths? Does it have beautiful lines and you want it to stand out? Then lighter colors and a crisp white trim may be just what you need. Perhaps its strength is that it’s a beach house. Or a deck house from the 60’s. Or do you think your home’s strength is actually the way it nestles comfortably into its landscaped surrounding? Because you may want to consider an earth tone with a low contrast trim, so the house doesn’t over-power the beauty around it. 

And how about the weaknesses? It’s nothing personal, we all have our struggles. Some homes struggle with directional issues, like perhaps everyone uses the mudroom door when you want them to use the front. A pop of color can help you with that. Or your house may have a three-car garage that sort of dominates your curb appeal. Bright white on those doors is not the best choice here, but something darker might work. Or some homes are not blessed with nice details like wide trim around the windows and doors. Using a trim color that is closer to the main color can help de-emphasize that problem.

Which actually brings up an important point: windows. Many people have exterior window frames that they are not going to paint, typically because they are made of a no-maintenance vinyl or aluminum. But those windows still need to be recognized as a color, especially if the trim around the windows is not very wide. Because if you paint your thin trim one color and your vinyl windows represent another color, the whole thing starts looking sort of spindly and anemic. You can take a drive and see what I mean. An easy approach is to match the window frame color to the color of the trim. And if that throws off your whole vision, then make them at least friendly cousins.  

You can tell already it’s a bit of a dance you’re having with all the pros and cons. In summary, I usually identify the main highlights of your home and then also its main challenges. And I figure out those two areas and let the rest of the house sort of follow along. I hope that makes some sense, because I don’t want to lose you before we’ve even had a chance to talk about color. 

Almost every home uses at least two colors. But most can use quite a few more. And I’m not talking about the “painted lady” victorians, I’m talking about your standard home. The stars of the show are, of course, the color for the main house color and the trim. When you first start thinking about what to paint your home, these are the two colors that you’ll be thinking about. But there are lots of other areas that may demand attention.

Take a walk around your house and note all the textural changes. You may notice your clapboard walls next to your cement foundation. Maybe you have shutters, or some paneling around a bay window, or some sweet shingles at the roof’s gable. There may be decking that needs new stain, or the ceiling of your farmer’s porch (which, if you are a true New Englander, you will paint a very light robins egg blue.) And then there is the front door, which can be tucked away sedately by using something like a black or burgundy. But it’s also an opportunity to show your personality - so if that’s you, go have at it. It’s easy to change if you don’t like it.

The trick is to enjoy the freedom of using all the colors that you need… but making it look like you used just a few. To do this you must employ a little restraint. First of all, accent colors are accent colors and should be used very sparingly. And use them in intuitive locations so that it looks natural and is, honestly, sort of invisible to the casual viewer. And second of all, your colors should all work together like they are part of a family. When you lay out your swatches on a white piece of paper, they should look like good friends. I mean they will be hanging out next to each other for seven years, give or take, so they darn well better get along. 

And now, finally, it’s time to pick your colors. But come to find out, there are, oh, about eleventy-seven-gazillion of them to choose from. So narrow down your playing field. You can take lots of drives to identify houses you like, and even freak out the owners by knocking on their door and demanding paint names. Or you can also just ask your sister what she used on her exquisite home. Yes, you can flip through magazines and troll for pics online - but it’s really better to work with something more concrete than that. But you can google something like: “designers best house colors”, and you’ll get some curated lists that might get you pointed in the right direction. 

And visit a paint store. Get a bunch of samples strips to take home and think about. Sometimes, high end “paint and decorating” stores will have a designer on staff that can help you. And if not, you can peruse the paint brochures. The paint companies are always offering suggestions for groups of colors and they present them in various brochures. 

A couple words of practical advice, and we’ll be done. When you collect swatches from the paint store they usually come on a strip with more colors in the same family. Cut off the ones you are interested in so you are only looking at those. It gets so distracting if you don’t. Flat colors look best on house walls and satin on trim - just trust me on that one. Think about how your paint colors will look with your foliage in all seasons - and take the color of your neighbor’s house into account as well. And be aware that paints fade over time - so if you are on the fence… go with something a tiny bit darker. And my last remaining snippets of advice? Swatch, swatch and make sure you swatch. Get solid coverage with two or three coats and swatch in a place where you can also paint the trim right next to it too, so you can see how those colors are working together. 

Look at us, we’ve done it! And you’ll know you’ve done a good job when strangers walk by and say, “What a beautiful home.” Because that’s what you want. You really don’t want anyone saying something like, “That’s an interesting color.” because we both know that’s not quite a compliment. 

And trust me, I use the same barometer on my self when I’m getting dressed for a fancy soiree. If someone takes my coat and says, “Wow that is certainly a festive sweater.” I know it’s pretty much time to slink home. So please, learn from my mistakes, and also, remember to swatch.

The Power of The Pause

Things move more slowly in August. I watch as the vacation weeks roll through the workforce in my industry, and even the plants seem to be taking a break in this drought. On my end, I find it harder to hustle-about at the same somewhat manic pace that I do at other times of the year. And it’s good for me. I’m actually not less productive, just on less of a high-alert. High alert mode sneaks up on me, and I don’t even know I’m doing it until I slow down a little. August is a good reminder to do that. That less can be more. That sometimes just making the space for a new perspective, is all we need. Because the new perspective might actually be out there waiting for us, it’s just waiting to be invited in. 



I have these clients, they are a couple that I worked with for a while last winter. This couple is purchasing the house that the woman grew up in, and it has good bones but needs to be updated from top to bottom. That sounds simple enough, but like every other major project, there ends up being lots of moving parts. This new home needs to accommodate not only their young family, but also her aging mother who is experiencing some health issues. And when my client looked ahead, she saw there was a potential need to accommodate her father and siblings as well - even if just for short stints. She was taking over the family home, and she felt that came with a responsibility. I was touched by that and I wanted to help.



But the project snowballed - which is not unusual when working on an older home with lots of deferred maintenance. Some big ticket items reared their heads like HVAC, electrical work, carpenter ants, and a septic system that might be failing. And the smaller ticket items (can we even call them that?) started to add up too. Toss into the mix two working parents, two young kids, covid outbreaks, other health issues, and the daunting task of needing to empty that family house to make way for the renovations. Renovations that they were increasingly doubtful they could afford. It was all just too much, and that very nice family reached a tipping point and called to say they were putting the project on hold. 



I recognized this as the right decision at the time, but I still struggled with it a bit. Because, selfishly, I like my projects to move along on a linear path: Meet new client, plan new project, construct new project, see family enjoying new project, and finally, me basking in the glow of a job well done. But honestly, very few major goals in life plod along that way. My clients were wise to get off that freight train that was barreling down a twisty path towards something that they hadn’t properly figured out yet. And yes, they oh so nicely asked me to get off that train too, and looking back I’m grateful to them for it. My job is to give them what they want, and if that goal is unclear I can’t possibly do my job well.



Pauses can come along at all different stages of a project. I have another client that is also pausing as they consult with an architect about their elevator. Pauses can happen while waiting for permits, or inspections, or land surveys, or conservation committee approvals. They are frequently groaned about. (Turns out it’s not just me that craves a linear path.) But sometimes what we may initially perceive as an obstacle can actually offer us the space we need to see something in a new way.



My clients got back in touch with me in early summer, and I could sense their clarity of thinking and fresh perspective right away. She and her husband were able to prioritize what they needed, and they were also ready to let some things go, which they just couldn’t do before. We came up with solutions that just felt right. And that’s such an important slice of the pie. If your budget is limited, you really need to have the conviction that you are making the right decisions. And figuring that out may just take a little time. 



So what did my clients end up compromising on? Well, there’s a giant chimney going through three floors that they chose to live with, although it would have been great to have it removed. We also simplified their kitchen, the mudroom, the basement build out and we didn’t add a portico to the exterior that would have looked really nice. But they dug deep to afford a lot of great features. They wanted this house to be both a wise investment and a forever home. So no flimsy materials or laminate counter tops or vinyl flooring. And yes to replacement windows, a good HVAC system, and a gaggle of home maintenance issues that the house was crying out for. They kept their upstairs laundry, a large shower for their primary bath, and a basement that will be finished in a very simple manner to offer them flexibility down the road. 



Life is filled with unexpected pauses that are so easy to dismiss as unfortunate events. Like taking time off from college to earn money to pay for it. Or spending several weeks on the couch because of an ACL. Or nursing a parent back to health. Or the pause that comes with the brand new baby in your arms, when you look down and know your life will never be quite be the same. For me, those were all turning points that I wouldn’t change a thing about. My joke used to be, “Ok God, you now have my full attention. I’m really listening.” And hopefully I’m better at listening now. My knees would certainly appreciate it.



My clients, with the family abode? Well, we’ll all have to stay tuned for the end of that story. Projects like these take a while. And that’s ok, because pauses are good, right? Right! I just may need a gentle reminder of that when September rolls around, but for now… I’m really listening.



— This article was originally published in The Manchester Cricket.

Counting Sleep

How nice it was to have the Fourth of July back in full swing. It’s the holiday of choice for these parts, and in my town the parade starts at 10am. Personally, this seems like an ill-advised hour for me to be arriving in last year’s red white and blues and have a mimosa thrust into my hand. But tradition is tradition and I don’t see this one changing any time soon. 



There is another tradition that arrives with the guests that join us. It’s the need for extra sleep space, and how far do we go to accommodate them? It’s a tricky business, so I find it helpful to break the overnight guests into three categories. 



Category 1 is for hosting “Guests of Honor.” This category is reserved for elderly relatives, or maybe one of your kids that just had a baby. They get a bonafide guest room and, if they are lucky, maybe a bathroom too. I won’t talk too much about them here, because they are pretty much all set. I mean, in a pinch you might even vacate your own room for them, right? They get the best of what you have.



Category 2 is otherwise known as “The Onslaught,” and I think most of us have experienced this at one time or another. These guests are the six college friends that came home with your son, whose names you never really quite got straight. These are the work friends that came for a beach weekend with your daughter, when you know she’s been looking for another job. Or the thrice removed cousins that were ‘“just passing through.” They are the guests that, although the loveliest of people, may arrive at the last minute and may very well be empty-handed. It’s ok, we won’t take it personally. 



And sure, “Come on in!” and “Of course you can bring your friends!” or relatives, or pet chinchilla. You’ve got a generous heart, and these types of visits come with their own set of silver linings. But for sleeping, these folks get air-mattresses, single trundle beds, a pull out, or even a makeshift bed of couch cushions under the dining room table. (Which is where I ended up during a memorable cape weekend many many years ago.)



Just think about it as if you are running a European hostel, where the accommodations are simple and where house rules apply. Figure out what yours are, but an example is deflating the air mattresses and folding the blankets into a stack in the morning. It’s all up to you of course. But please don’t buy bunk beds for these folks, or convert your family room into permanent sleeping berths in anticipation of visits like these. They are really just so lucky to have whatever you choose to offer. 



Lastly there is Guest Category 3, or ”Our Loved Ones,” and these folks may require some special care. Maybe they are your children or your mother or your college friends. But these are bed spaces that deserve some of your attention. Give them nice linens, and maybe some cut flowers - even if you have them sleeping under the dining room table. 



There is lots of practical advice for housing these special Category 3 folks. Like outfitting your office with a murphy bed (much more comfortable than a pull out,) or creating a dormitory in that room over the garage, or in the attic or the basement. These are the guests that you might actually buy a bed frame for. Because you love them and you really want them to come back.



Other sneaky sleep spaces can be found in sheds, garages or even boathouses. I see this done a lot in vacation communities. They empty out their storage areas when the weather gets warm and they convert these spaces into guest houses. I slept in one on the Vineyard - a converted shed. Yes, it was a chilly tiptoe to the bathroom in the main house - but it was worth it because the shed was so thoughtfully outfitted. I honestly appreciated the privacy and just tried not to drink a bunch of water before bed. 



The wall mounted “mini-split” heating and air conditioning units really lend themselves to taking unused spaces and making them functional for your needs. They are not dirt cheap, but depending on your situation, they may be worth the investment.  



And these found spaces? You don’t have to fully renovate the whole room… maybe just spray it all white, throw down an area rug, clean the windows, install the screens, and then thoroughly de-cobweb. The nice linens and your quality pillows will do the rest. When you’re done, cover everything with sheets, turn off the mini-split and be ready for the next round of guests that roll through. 



As for impractical advice? Well, I have an embarrassing amount of ideas. Like putting a vintage airstream under a tree in the back yard… Or building a tree house for a guest house… Or putting up some “glamping” type tents on wooden platforms… Or what the heck? How about buying land and setting up a series of A-frames (they come in kits! I could build one for each child!) And don’t even get me started on houseboats. Honestly. 



See how easy it is for my inner crazy to leak out? But ultimately my point is this: Go the extra mile for those special guests. Find them some space. Give them nice pillows, clean sheets, and a cut flower. And then they will forgive your inner crazy too.

— This article was originally published in The Manchester Cricket

Taming that Multi-Tentacled Monster

Getting going on a home remodeling project can feel deceivingly simple in the beginning. Clients usually know they want certain things, like to renovate a kitchen and to add a family room for instance. That’s easy enough to envision, right?

But there’s more. How about that furnace? Is it up to the task of heating this extra square footage? And how will you marry the new concrete foundation with your old field stone one that is, whoops, failing in some areas? How will those new double paned windows look next to your existing ones with the aluminum storms screwed to their frame? If we’re adding a new roof to the addition, should we also do the rest of the roof since it’s over 25 years old? You can see how this simple project is starting to turn into a monster.

But there’s still more. Even setting aside those non-negotiable structural and utility issues, there will be plenty of other areas that will be calling for your aesthetic attention. New paint can make old paint feel very drab. The nice new trim you like may not match the rest of the house and you want the downstairs to look cohesive. Or how about that newel post that’s chronically loose? Or that painted 1970’s paneling in the laundry room - is it time to finally get rid of that?

I sometimes refer to this process as “project sprawl”, but the term doesn’t sit well with me. It sounds too negative and infectious. There is absolutely nothing wrong with this process, and in fact there are many things right about it. When managed properly and efficiently you are fully prepared for the project as it gets underway, and you should be getting more bang for your buck, not less. So let’s add a mudroom to that family room for instance. Maybe you can’t afford a fancy built-in, but you can get the framework built and add some closets for a relatively small increase in cost. A simple bench with hooks will be good for now. You can do the fancy version when you get your next promotion.

I know it can feel counter-intuitive to be adding additional items to your renovation list, after you’ve maybe just learned you need a new furnace. But when your project begins, there you will be, with all kinds of skilled workers traipsing through your house and disrupting your routines. There is honestly no better time to think big picture and add a few more things to your list. Assuming, of course, you can afford it.

At the beginning of any project, one of my first client goals is to create a Scope of Work document. It’s where I take that wooly-booger of a project with all it’s tentacles and sub-projects, and break it down into groups with clear, outlined steps. It is sort of a master plan. And if you have been overwhelmed by this project - this is when you will start feeling better. The Scope of Work ensures that we are all (me, my client, the contractor and his subs) on the exact same page. It’s the document I use to get estimates with. And it is clear enough to ensure that, with multiple estimates, everyone is pricing the same thing.

If you work with someone like me, the Scope of Work document will include “before” and “after” floor plans with dimensions marked. It will have notes for the electrician, plumber, woodworker or wallpaper installer. It will be detailed enough to obtain comprehensive estimates, even though I haven’t yet started designing the space in a significant aesthetic way. I’ve got to do just enough work to know the big stuff. Like how big that family room is, and that I want a wall of tile here, or two sconces there. But I don’t want to start billing my design hours until we can look at some prices and see if that impacts our Scope. So it’s a little bit of a push-me-pull-you phase until the scope and budget get finalized.

This is my business. I have a methodology, design software, and trade professionals I can call on for advice. Those of you doing it on your own may bring other things to the table. But I know you’ve got ingenuity, resourcefulness and (hopefully) some time - so pull together your own Scope of Work. It may not look like mine, but as a DIYer, any steps you take towards creating a similar type of document will benefit you. Even if it’s just a list. It’s like every other important project you take on in life - don’t skimp on the planning phase.

So go buy some graph paper and colored pencils. Draw your existing space and map out your addition. Think like a contractor who needs to estimate this project - what will they need to know? And same goes for your electrician, or plumber. Lean on good friends who have been through a renovation and can share what they’ve learned. Stuck on HVAC questions? Get a professional out to pick their brain. Google stuff. Take notes. Gather pictures. Stay organized. And most importantly, stick with it. Your wooly booger multi tentacled monster can indeed be tamed, but you have to roll up your sleeves to wrestle it to the ground.

Will a good Scope of Work eliminate all surprises? No, that unicorn doesn’t exist in the world of renovation. But with the proper planning and research, the surprises can be significantly reduced. And you will have a system in place as to how you will address them when they do arrive.

Last weekend I proudly attended my third child’s graduation from art school. She started school somewhere else, thinking she wanted something else. My ex and I cohabitated the graduation events with politeness and good cheer, but I was still struck by the change in how we all now define family. The graduation itself was scheduled as a two hour event and went for four hours instead. Yeesh, there is just so much in life we can’t plan for. But a renovation project? Now that’s something I can plan the crap out of. And I think you can too.

– This article was originally published in The Manchester Cricket.

Flowers, Forsythia and Fiddleheads

We are smack in the season I like to call Not Quite Summer. Do you know how I knew for sure? I was in the city the other day and everyone’s ankles were out. Everyone’s! Tan ones, brown ones, hairy ones (note to self on grooming) and yes even my pink freckled ones. I guess it’s the part of our bodies that we are willing to first expose to our fickle New England weather. I exposed mine for a client meeting the other morning and they just kept screaming up, “We’re freezing!!! We’re not ready!” So I covered them up for for my next appointment, but the sun came out and, “We’re boiling down here!! Let us out!” After that I pretty much changed into my sweatpants. Not Quite Summer can be a little exhausting for me.

But I know I’m alone. Most of you LOVE the muddy ground and the forsythia and crocuses and daffodils popping out. (It occurs to me, that those plants are sort of the ankles of mother nature.) And even I am not immune to their charms. They are such great harbingers of the promising summer before us that they can warm even my crotchety soul.

So what do I do to embrace this shoulder season? Well, for one, I celebrate an old friend: the humble, ever-cheerful, frost-resistant pansy. For me they pack a punch for a small price tag. Yes they get straggly by the end of June, but honestly, who cares? You’ve still gotten maybe six good weeks of good cheer out of them (with a little deadheading) and that’s a pretty good return on investment. And when they are past their prime, I just shift them to a back corner and give some other showy annual the center stage for those summer months. They don’t seem to mind. They all get a turn.

Pansy’s I don’t re-pot. (Their life span is so short - I try to not to get too emotionally invested.) But I do re-pot every other flowery annual that I grab from a garden store, or HomeDepot or even the supermarket. I break up that root ball and let them soak up some water, then let them spread out in a larger pot. They’ve all been over-fertilized at the store, so to me it’s like loosening their belts a notch after a big meal. It lets them settle in and encourages growth. With the right conditions they will double in size really quickly.

The overall look for container gardens seem to go one of two ways. If you’re feeling creative, you can look for unusual flower and color combinations and strive for a creative balance of different heights, densities, and foliages. The results are stunning even though, to be honest, I’m not the best at it. But I have friends who really are - and I’m a big appreciator of what they can pull off. I do notice that this method requires some extra maintenance however. Certain plants do better than others, and my talented friends pop in a little of this and fill in with a little of that to keep their window boxes looking robust throughout the summer.

But me? I’m a salty, practical, busy New Englander. So I tend to get the hardiest plants I can find and maybe just in one color. Even boring old white. Lots of white run-of-the-mill geraniums, super petunias, impatiens or verbenas - nothing fancy here. I’m after the ones that are hard to kill. I might break it up a little with some colorful foliage from a potato plant or coleus. But all of it is easy peasy. I do take the time to re-pot, and deadhead, and fertilize, and water regularly. But those plants? Some of them last until the first hard frost without much fussing. And I love the overall look, so for me that approach is a big win.

How about bringing some of that outside in? It’s past the time when we can force the forsythia and azalea into blooming inside, but truth be told, I try to force just about anything. I have the best luck taking cuttings from skinny little growths that are just starting to reveal their leaves. Inside I put them in water and if I hit it right, I get to watch the leaves come out. No blossoms here. But honestly, anything green and growing makes me pretty happy this time of year. I was at the pet store the other day and bought three little pots of grass. It’s supposed to be for your cats to eat, but I shoo mine away. Those cheerful little pots of optimism are gracing my windowsill and they are all mine.

If you get out in the woods at all you’ll notice the ferns starting to unfurl. They are sort of amazing to watch because they start out as these tight little spirals, and then get taller as they start to uncurl, and finally spread out into what will be a large fern leaf with all it’s little sub-leaves in there. It’s just a miracle of nature I think. They call them fiddleheads (which is fun to say) and sometimes you see them all curled up in the produce section, but I can’t bring myself to eat those baby ferns. It just doesn’t seem right.

Additionally, I know there is a lot of internet pressure to give your whole house a “Spring Refresh.” Something about those postings bring out my sullen and uncooperative side. I guess I don’t like being told what to do, and honestly who has the time to refresh their whole house in such a thorough manner? So I dig my heels in a little on that, but I will admit to a swap-out of a few key accessories. I choose just a few places with high visibility. Your places may be different, but I bring out some linen pillows for my couch and maybe a new dining table display, or some cuttings for my windowsill. AlI spots that bring me joy. So go ahead and do it. But do it for you, not because you’ve been guilted into some weirdly competitive game of Spring Refresh.

Ok, so here’s one last things. (But to be clear, I’m not guilting you into anything.) Get your hose and broom out and give your seasonal spaces a thorough welcome back shower. Hose down those corners and walls and get rid of your residual pine cones and (heaven forbid) christmas wreaths. It’s Not Quite Summer, but be ready, because Summer is Coming! (Which actually might be a nicer name for this season.) So hose off everything. Hose off your back patio. Hose off your lawn furniture. Hose off last fall’s cobwebs. Hose off last winter’s Covid. Hose off your ex-husband. Hose off your cat. Heck, hose ME off. And if you did, I thank you for it. Turns out I actually did need that spring refresh.

– This article was originally published in The Manchester Cricket.

Survival of the Fittest?

On any given day, as an interior designer, I may be invited in to someone’s home to talk about how that home is working for them and how it is not. It’s an introductory meeting and I do them all the time, but I’m still struck by their intimate nature. I mean, I’m not only asking you to share your home with me, but I’m also asking you how you live in it. And how we live? Well that’s a cornerstones of how we define ourselves as humans. I’m honored to be part of that conversation and even more honored if I’m hired for the project.

Each home is as different as their owners are - yet there seem to be questions that are common to all. The first thing most potential clients wonder is, what do interior designers actually do? And then they wonder if they really need one. And if they do, they wonder if I’m the right one for them. All great questions. I just wish there was a one-size-fits-all answer.

In general, I think the most important thing to keep in mind is that the designer-client relationship is all about the right FIT, and an introductory meeting is a great way to assess that. Don’t ignore your first gut instincts. Did your designer communicate clearly? Were they on time and professional? Do they seem generally knowledgable about their field? Were they listening? Did they ask questions? Did you like them? This is a relationship you may be embarking upon — you need to make sure it will work for you. You can also google additional questions regarding experience, references, billing practices, etc. Those questions are important too. But don’t ignore those first impressions.

To be honest, as an interior designer on an introductory meeting, I’m running through a list of questions of my own. Like you, I too am trying to tap into my gut instinct about the fit. But I’m also asking myself if I fully understand your aesthetic. And if what you are trying to accomplish is realistic. And is this project one hundred percent in my wheelhouse, because if it’s not then someone else could do it better, faster, and cheaper - and that’s who you should be working with. Basically, do I think I could go into your home and be a rock star - because that’s what every client deserves. And happy clients lead to a pleasant work environment. And pleasant work environments lead to beautiful results. And beautiful results lead to referrals. So it’s all a process that I take very seriously.

But do you actually need me? Well, sometimes yes and sometimes no. It’s an easy yes if I’m talking to a couple of scientists (for instance) with no creative sense because they’re busy coming up with vaccines and saving lives. If that’s you, I can really help. I’ll look at your home holistically to make sure my recommendations are in line with your needs. I’ll provide 3D drawings so you are able to visualize the results. And I’ll add a level of thoughtful detail into that design which will elevate your project beyond what you could have accomplished on your own. Additionally I can manage the construction process, handling the details and making sure your contractor has everything they need, and that your crew is smiling. I can’t completely eliminate the stress you’ll feel living through a substantial renovation, but I can certainly make it easier. So, yes, I say to potential clients like these. I have this one fabulous skill set, and you have a completely different, but equally as fabulous, skill set. So let me help you achieve good design, and I’ll leave the vaccines to you.

The question is a little trickier when my potential client seems to be capable and knowledgeable and expresses an interest in doing some stuff themselves and also wants to save money. (You GO all you adventurous DIY-ers!) If this is you, you really might not need me. I might offer you some advice and encourage you to, well… go have at it. Especially if I don’t think your budget can afford me. I don’t want to be like the grinch reaching down and taking your last can of who—hash! I want more for you than that. So roll-up-your-sleeves, arm yourself with a good contractor and lots of pictures of what you want, and keep your design as simple as possible. There is so much free design advice out there between Pinterest, and Google, awesome sales people, and friends with great taste. Will it be a part-time job for you? Absolutely. But that’s how sweat equity gets earned.

There are certain situations that I think hands down really benefit from design help. One of them is if you are living in a tricky house. These homes may be tricky just because they have an open floor plan where all the elements really need to work together. But they can also be houses with problems. Maybe you live in a rambling post-and-beam, and you want it to be more homey. Maybe it’s making sense of an unfortunate addition. Maybe it’s taking a spec house with it’s cheap finishes and making it feel more custom. These problems are tough for me to tackle, and I’m a design professional, so don’t go it alone. I mean, the stakes are high, right? This stuff isn’t cheap. And keep in mind that you’re also protecting the investment you made when purchasing your home. So get some help and get it done right.

Other situations where I think it would be silly to go it alone? Large projects are in that category. Like when you want to renovate that house before you move in. There are just so many moving parts to manage. Or a high-end project — when you desire a level of design that you just simply need a design professional to help you achieve. Or a make-it-go-away project like updating some bathrooms in a second home. Or an investment project when the goal is to get it on the market as quickly as possible. There’s help out there for all that.

The good news is that an initial introductory meeting is usually just that. You’re not getting married. You’re not even committing to a series of dates. Just follow your gut and do your research, and don’t settle for anything less than a rock star. It’s the same advice your mother would give before you go on that blind date. And you know your mom is always right.

– This article was originally published in The Manchester Cricket.

Light’s Out, New England

Here we are. A whole new year thrust upon us. And almost as proof of this, there is the subtle change of landscape that I witness every year about this time. Our holiday lights are slowly coming down, and for me, it’s an adjustment. A spot that was once bathed in sparkle, is now just - well, I guess its true self. We are putting the lights away until next year. So it’s official. It’s time to get back to the business of being salty New Englanders.

I spent an odd amount of time this year looking at house lights and wondering about the personalities of the people that put them up. For instance, in my town there is no shortage of the tasteful white lights that outline the roofs and house edges. I picture an engineer at work there. That person has calculated the length of their roofline and coordinated it with the length of their tasteful, matching lights. They might also add a candle in every window. It’s a crisp no-nonsense approach that I appreciate, and when there are multiple houses adorned this way it feels oh so New England.

Conversely, there are also the homes with lights that look almost partially installed. Like the motivation was there on a warm December afternoon, but then some of the strands didn’t turn on and it started to get dark and cold, and oh well, maybe we’ll just highlight that one little shrub this year. If this is you (and it has been me) I’m here to say that I appreciate your effort! No it didn’t quite pull together this year like you thought, but nonetheless you bravely turned on that string of lights every night, and probably made that shrub feel pretty good about itself in the process. Don’t worry. You’ll get ‘em next year.

Then there are those go-big-or-go-home gamblers that have the giant blown-up, nylon Santa’s on their front yard with a blower at his feet. I get the appeal. These cloth sculptures offer a big statement with minimal headaches and just a little bit of space needed to store it away when the party’s over. But how minimal is that headache? Because the WOW-factor that comes when they are operating properly, seems to be pretty well counter balanced by how SAD they look when they are deflated on the front yard. Like maybe Santa got involved in a horrible accident and is now laying flat on the lawn in his worst pair of underwear for all the world to see. Oh Santa, how the mighty have fallen! I avert my gaze as I drive by.

Probably the least festive to me are the short-cut lights. These busy folks throw a netting of lights over a shrub or two, and maybe some icicle lights on their porch. They are all about bang for their installation-buck. Their lights technically say Happy Holidays, but when I drive by I suspect somebody’s heart is just not in it. (And by the way, don’t believe the packaging. That netting isn’t fooling anyone.)

But how about the more-is-more houses? What’s up with these folks? Do they go so over the top because they are just over the top themselves and they love it all so much that climate change, traffic, and their electric bill will not deter their instinct to go all-in? Because I’ve got respect for that kind of commitment. But part of me wonders if perhaps that process has taken on a life of its own, and if they are left feeling a little bit burdened by the responsibility. I mean, are the kids and grandkids all grown, and has arthritis kicked in, but darn it they bought that shed to store all that stuff in and by now the neighbors are asking and so up it goes year after year? Are they putting it all up not because it brings them joy, but because they can’t figure out a way to stop? I find it all a little unsettling, and I tend to drive by those homes like they’re a crime scene on a dark night. I drive by slowly, to take it all in, but I also lock the doors because it feels like just about anything could happen there.

My ex-husband used to put up lights that he would string into the shape of stars or snowflakes. It was a labor-intensive project involving bungee cords and scaffolding, ladders and string. He enjoyed the artistic expression of it, and that was sweet to see. They looked great at night, but during the day it had a little bit of a “backstage” quality that leaned towards messy to my eye. And also, if one of the strings gave out then nobody could really tell what was going on, night or day. So it was a delicate affair that took a good amount of fiddling and adjusting, probably a little bit like our marriage.

Oddly, the lights that have spoken to me the most this year are those put up by the quirky single-stranders. Now at first glance you may confuse them with the partially-finished folks, because their trees can look a bit sparse. But they are not at all alike. The single-stranders tend to use lights in a color, which alone can be refreshing. And they tend to spiral the strand loosely around the branches of a medium sized tree. The lights cling from one branch to the next creating a swoopy shape that the tree dictates. It looks almost like a giant hand reached down and gently looped that tree with lights from above. The spiraling swoop ends when the the string of lights do. And when I drive by I can almost here a quiet “tah-da” being issued from those branches. Their sweet simplicity buoyed me through the holiday season, and I’m sorry to see them go.

There are more types of lights to consider. How about the projected images of snowstorms that we see now lighting up the fronts of houses? (I haven’t figured those people out yet, but the effect is pretty enough.) But time is short and my rustic, unadorned New England landscape beckons.

But I don’t know, is that bare landscape really unadorned? Just take a walk on the beach at sunset, or step out onto your porch to experience the softness and quiet that comes with an evening snowstorm. I think it’s still sparkly out, It’s just coming at us in a different way.

– This article was originally published in The Manchester Cricket.

It's the time of year when I quote from my favorite holiday special, A Charlie Brown Christmas. Lucy says to her blanket-toting little brother, “You think you’re so smart with that blanket. What are you gonna do with it when you grow up?” Linus replies, “Maybe I’ll turn it into a sport coat.” Which, besides cracking me up, is actually pretty wise. During the holidays we want the comfort and security that some of our old habits and traditions can provide. So like the blanket that Linus wants to turn into a sport coat, I’d like to honor some of the unsung heroes of our holiday decor. A time to pause over the humble work horses that can frequently go without acknowledgement. 

For starters, I present you with my first candidate, THE HURRICANE VASE. Hurricane vases were so named because you put candles in them during a (wait for it) hurricane. But for my purposes any tall clear glass vase will do. For some undefinable reason - everything you pop into them looks better than it did on it’s own. Start by popping in some greens and a pinecone. Poof! Instantly those humdrum ingredients take on a whole different light. And guess what? It works on everything! Like twigs, or Christmas ornaments, or candles, or cranberries, or an Elf on the Shelf, or twinkly lights, or candy canes. Once they are in the vases - they look curated somehow. Like a collection. You can group them on the end of a mantle, or display them in a line down your table runner. Anything goes. Some of my favorite hurricane vases came from the dollar store - just classic, simple, glass columns. I’m sure they sell beautiful ones at PotteryBarn too, but they don't have to be fancy.

Another work horse worth honoring is THE GARLAND. Yes, we twist it around the railings on our front porches but it's also a great element to bring inside. It doesn't take up too much room, it brings instant holiday cheer to every place it graces, and it smells good too. (Don't you wish you could say that about all your holiday house guests?) And, sure, put it on the mantle or down the stair railing. But also try it in unexpected places like around a curtain rod, or inside a bowl, or frame the bathroom mirror with it. Even let the kids have some. You’ll see. For quality, there is the standard HomeDepot variety, and then there are also drop-dead gorgeous ones that you can buy from specialty shops if your budget allows. Me? I usually "hook up" an inexpensive variety with additional greens, or ornaments, or pinecones, or driftwood… even matchbook cars. Honestly it doesn't matter. Just grab your glue gun and florists wire or twine, and have at it.

And while we’re at it, let's give a very honorable mention to that other kind of garland. The ones your kids can string, made out of popcorn and cranberries, or pom-poms and paper cut outs. I personally like these on the sparse side, with their string showing between the items, but I honestly love them all. Even those paper chains made from construction paper. I'm just a sucker for anything home made.

I’d also like to call out a very effective holiday weapon in my arsenal: a can of WHITE SPRAY PAINT. You know how I said everything looks better in a hurricane vase? Well just about anything can also look better painted white too. Yup, right down to that Elf on the Shelf or even your cat. Don't be shy. You can spray them carefully on all sides for 100% coverage (tricky with the cat), or just hit them with a little spray to look more like snow. But the addition of the white brings some unity and calm to a dangerously chaotic time of year for decorating. I like the matte finish, but shiny works too.

And here I present you with a humble area of the home often overlooked for holiday festivities. It’s YOUR CEILING. I used to host a large family Christmas Eve dinner. It was a big effort that our whole family participated in, and our tablescapes were different every year. One year I had the kids cut little paper snowflakes out of tracing paper. We dipped the edges in glitter, and literally just hung them from the ceiling with string and scotch tape. (I did, however, discover the hard way that tall candles and hanging paper are not a good mix... So, safety first everyone!) But I've also woven twigs or a garland around light fixtures, or tied individual ornaments over the curtain rods, or hung something green that I can call mistletoe in the foyer. The best tools to aid you in this venture? Those removable, adhesive hooks and maybe some battery-operated fairy lights. 

One of my last unsung heroes is, surprisingly, THE PLASTIC TUB. My hat is off to the tub as it keeps our Christmas items safe and dry and insect-free for eleven months of the year. And for that last month of December? They do double duty by holding all the decorative items that our holiday decorations have displaced. Because this time of year, it's so easy to slip from "cozy and festive" into "chaos and clutter.” So don’t be shy about editing. You have a tub for that. And don’t worry, the other stuff will all come back in January.

Did I say that was my last hero? Because I have one more. MOM. And yes, yes, yes - Dad’s too! And also grandparents and teachers and nice neighbors and kind strangers. I have a place in my heart for all of them! But Mom’s are frequently the directors of this well orchestrated event known as The Holidays. And like most things parenting related, it’s beautiful and messy and exhausting and rewarding and heart-felt all at once. 

And so, fittingly, I’ll honor those maternal directors with one more quote from A Charlie Brown Christmas. It is said by my hero, Lucy Van Pelt. She’s frustrated with the short attention spans of the pageant crew. She wags her finger and yells at them, “Listen, all of you! You've got to take direction! You've got to have discipline! You've got to have respect for your director!” Lucy turns around and sees that Snoopy, behind her, has been mimicking her motions and is ruthlessly mocking her. Lucy pauses and says to Snoopy in a low voice, “I oughta slug you!”

Ahhh, the heartfelt roller coaster of emotions that mark holidays! I’ve certainly been there. But Lucy doesn’t actually slug Snoopy. And there she is singing with the other children at the end. So if she can do it, so can I.

– This article was originally published in The Manchester Cricket.

Consider The Kitchen

Professionally, it’s been a streaky year for me. Last spring I hit a point where I was working on twelve bathrooms at one time. This fall, it seems to be all about kitchens. Both rooms are sort of cornerstones of my business in their own way, but the design process for each couldn’t be more different. 

Bathrooms can be like little isolated works of art. It can be fun to do something bold, or even cute, or even themed. (Which is not typically my jam, but for a bathroom? Sometimes crazy enough to work.) So if your powder room strays just a bit from the general aesthetic of the rest of the home, it can be forgiven. Its doors are usually shut and most homes have more than one. So go ahead and paper the walls with your 1970’s post card collection. A bit much? Maybe, but it’s ok because your other bath could be all about nuanced textures and restrained neutral tones. See? It can all work out.

Kitchens are an entirely different animal. And by animal I mean more like a large, hairy, wooly-booger of an octopus. For starters, kitchens are almost always doing double duty. On any given day mine can double as a home office, conference room, homework center, dog kennel, or therapist’s office. Additionally, think about the tasks that I ask my kitchen to facilitate; the cooking, prepping, storing, cleaning, cooling, and heating of food. And with all that going on, what do we usually want our kitchens to look like? We want them to look calm and organized and stylish and friendly of course. And we also want it to just blend right in to the rest of the house - especially for open floor plans.

Impossible? Not at all. Just a little bit of a sudoku - perplexing in its way, but so satisfying to wrestle to the ground. When my kids were young, I used to call my kitchen Command Central - and to be honest I still think about them that same way for my clients. So how do I tackle this octopus of a task and bring order back to Command Central? Well, the same way I clean up big splattery messes (minus the cursing.) I work from the outside in. 

For the early stages of a kitchen design, I start with very broad strokes. Most clients want to talk right away about the finishes that they like. And that’s a good thing. It’s all information, and a big part of my job is collecting it at this stage. But what I really want is to just get my client talking. I like to see their existing kitchen and the rest of their house, and hear what they like and don’t like about them. I like to know what problems they are trying to solve with this renovation and what their general aesthetic is. What’s their lifestyle? What are their must-haves and their hates? And I also talk about practical concerns, like when they want to start construction.

I make a point to keep my first set of sketches very loose. I’m mostly looking at work flow, function, and architectural changes. Maybe we add some windows over here, or take out a wall and expand over there. Maybe we can add this island if we run cabinets along that wall. Let’s make sure the dishwasher will be located near dish storage. Let’s keep that refrigerator convenient to the cook but also accessible to the rest of the house. And let’s tuck a pantry in next to those wall ovens. Keeping my sketches loose and easy to change facilitates a free flow of ideas, for both me and my client, and that’s where the best solutions come from. I make sure I am listening carefully and willing to pivot as needed.

From there, my plans get tightened up. I incorporate standard cabinet sizes, and nail down issues like adequate traffic patterns, window sizes, and door swings. And that coffee bar that can be closed off with a garage-like door? Well this is when I figure out exactly what that might look like. 

And finally we circle in further to discuss materials and finishes. It’s at this stage that we nail down cabinets styles, granite, tile, lighting, hardware, and flooring. Plus, paint colors, window treatments and artwork. But remember the goal. It was calm, organized, stylish and friendly. Making all those decisions will FEEL complicated, because they can be, but at the end they shouldn’t LOOK complicated. It should all feel so cohesive that people come in and just say it looks great, and then want to BE in the space. Because there really is no larger compliment than that. (And poof, that splattery spill is all cleaned up!)

So if you are doing this on your own, be your own client. Complete the steps, do your research, work with quality vendors and builders, and probably use some design restraint. (Which doesn't mean you must go all-white.) Keep careful records along the way to document the details. (Hello Pinterest.) So you'll be able to check that the finish of your faucet will go nicely with the finish on your cabinet hardware.  

So, for me? Which do I like more, kitchens or bathrooms? My answer is the classic: I like them both in different ways. (Gosh that was frustrating to hear as a child.) And now I hear myself say it more and more about all kinds of things. Like sunrises or sunsets, favorite colors, cats or dogs, spring or fall, sour dough or whole wheat. Honestly, sometimes life is just an embarrassment of riches because they are all pretty great in their own way. So I stand by my answer. I like them both. Even if I still think my mother liked me best.

– This article was first published in The Manchester Cricket.

The Art of Finding Your You-ness

As some of you may know, my design mantra is all about putting your “you-ness” into your home. So it may surprise you that as a designer, my first priority is not your you-ness, but it is that your room be functional. Let’s take your bedroom for example. Is it a space that is conducive to sleeping, nesting, resting, dressing… even romance? Can you easily access your clothing and view your outfit? Is there a handy place for books, remote controls, and charging cables? I need room for a yoga mat in mine. Your needs will be different. But all that? That’s what I think your bedroom’s first job is.

Capturing the “you-ness”? That’s it’s second job. And I know many struggle with that vague term, but your you-ness can be as simple as a list of your must-have’s. Like I must have that colorful crocheted blanket because it was my mother’s, or I must have jewel green wall paper because even the thought of it makes my toes curl. Or perhaps your you-ness is in family photos, or a collection of driftwood, or baseballs, or an ancient stuffed animal. There are no rights or wrongs here. It just takes a little bit of thoughtfulness about yourself, and figuring out what makes you happy. Which is not a bad exercise in general, or so my therapist keeps telling me. (And you’re welcome. I’ll bill you later for the session.)

Let’s use artwork as an example because it’s one of the easiest ways to incorporate your you-ness into your home. It instantly adds interest and color and personality and depth. You may be able to list the people you know that have artwork that you like - because it can be that memorable. Or if not, figure it out. Go to a museum or the library and see what you respond to. Don’t grace your walls with fill-the-space art like a vacation rental furnished at the Christmas Tree Shop. Don’t hang poorly framed art of daisy’s or ships that you inherited from your uncle that mean absolutely nothing to you. Choose artwork that is an expression of that thoughtfulness about yourself that my therapist just demanded. It is a 100% you-do-you zone, and what could be better than that?

But first, take a deep breath and prepare yourself for the fact that any kind of artwork is an investment. I mean any kind. Tastefully framing that old postcard? A surprising investment. If you approach collecting art frugally, your biggest expense will be for proper framing. But DO NOT skimp on proper framing. Save your money until you can do it right. It’s that important. If you go to a local frame shop you’ll get expert advice and service at a bit of a higher price. But if you are confident in your tastes, go ahead and try a discount frame store and save a few dollars. But be warned, at both places you will spend more money than you expect. Trust me. It just adds up. But it’s totally worth it for all that the fabulous you-ness you are expressing! And also just for how great it feels to have art in your home. It really is pretty great. And so grown up.

So here’s the good news. Art is everywhere and everything can be art!! But first you need to unlock your inner curator. Make a point of noticing and appreciating loveliness…anywhere. You’ll find it in restaurants, coffee shops, other peoples homes, on the street, or in your child’s eyes. You just have to make a point to see it. And while you’re at it, take note of how it’s displayed too. It’s just practice. I remember when my son was young, he unknowingly demanded this same thing of me. And I will never look at construction equipment the same way again. To this day, I still see a giant crane, or scaffolding on a building, or even those big trucks that spit out the jersey barriers through my son’s eyes. He taught me that. So you can do this.

And where to find it? There are the easy, traditional, and sometimes expensive avenues - going to galleries or art openings. Nothing could better and it’s an important industry to support, but I know it can be overwhelming if you are just starting out. But try it. Go to a local art show anyway. You’ll be amazed at what you can get for a few hundred dollars. Maybe a small painting already framed. Maybe some signed prints. Or maybe you just practice noticing the loveliness there. Keep an open mind and stretch a little. It’s actually fun and it won’t take up your whole night, and again, you feel so grown up after.

When I started collecting, I haunted the thrift stores and yard sales. I never ignored the stack of mis-matched paintings that leaned in the corner or against a tree. Yes, it was usually a pile of poorly framed old ships and daisy’s, but every once in a while you’ll find a cool old map or poster, or just a painting that speaks to you. It’s like panning for gold! It’s a little addictive and I’ll still do it today. Do you want to up your game? Go to some of the higher end consignment or eclectic antique stores, and look at that same stack of paintings in the corner. It’s the same idea, but with less stuff you don’t want. And of course there is Etsy and Ebay. I found a treasure trove of vintage Russian nationalist posters on Ebay that I framed for a software company and put in their lunch room, which was sort of a joke about the desired work ethic. They were a big hit, but who knows what you’ll find. Just check and make sure you are getting real, signed art or authentic original posters - not the printed duplicates that are all over the internet.

And lastly? Embrace the art around you. Consider articles of clothing, keys, your kid’s art (but don’t overdo that category), pages from old children’s books, albums from the 70’s, a collection of wheels mounted on the wall, bottles of hot sauce on a shelf. For heavens sake, I have a collection of hands! Clearly anything goes!

And by the way, let me finish what I started with that list of priorities for your bedroom. Guess what comes up as the low ranking third priority? (And to review, function was number one and you-ness was number two.) It’s the actual design of the room. The thing that most people hire me for actually comes up third on my list of priorities! It still ends up being the bulk of the job: the architectural details, the paint, the furniture the window treatments, all the soft and hard furnishings. But it should act like the glue that holds those first two priorities in place. Then you have all: function, personality and style.

– This article was first published in The Manchester Cricket.

The Wild West of Choosing a Contractor

My friend’s son is getting married - and I think it makes everyone in our group feel a little bit older. But it got me to thinking about that first house that we owned, on that dead-end street where we all raised our kids. Our house needed some work, and I was young and absolutely baffled by how to go about hiring someone. I turned to an AOL chatroom for guidance (I told you I was young,) and I got the same list there that you would probably get if you googled the topic today. It would tell you: Ask for referrals from friends (although I was new to the area.) Call their references (which I did, but the reviews were SO glowing I was suspicious.) Discuss their billing practices (but I had nothing to compare it to, remember? No experience.) So yes, I did that due-diligence, but I didn’t feel like I was any closer to having a comfort level with how I was going to get the work done.

Today, as a designer, I use contractors all the time and even still it’s nerve-wracking to try out someone new, although my list of questions have improved. I think my strongest tactic is to just to engage them in conversation. It’s important to get a sense of how they operate on that basic level. Are they tired and rushed and terse with their responses? And if so does this make them a bad contractor? No it doesn’t, but depending how YOU operate, it might make them a bad fit.

Jumping back to my younger years, I finally did choose a builder. He ended up being the brother of a neighbor, so that made me feel better. And he did beautiful work, but he was a little bit of what I now call a cowboy. He rarely returned my calls, I never really knew when he was going to show up or leave, and things would get done with details in place that we had never discussed. Plus he would pop sudden questions on me like, “Where are those door handles that I need to install right now?” I remember I wanted to change directions on my project, which I was nervous about telling him. I didn’t leave my house all morning in the hopes of catching that cowboy so we could talk. When he still wasn’t there at pickup time for my kids, I called a neighbor to cover for me and left her with frantic instructions to call me RIGHT AWAY if she saw his truck pull in. I honestly think I would have left my kids in the middle of the highway in order to catch him. I was at my wits end.

The project got done, but yeesh, the stress. What the young me needed was to think more about what MY needs were for that project. I was inexperienced. I needed to work with someone who was organized and a good communicator, and I should have been better about utilizing those same qualities myself. I needed to share that I was new to this. That I needed some help with managing my expectations. That I had a gaggle of young kids that made it really difficult to make split second decisions and for me to pick out materials on the spot. With that kind of a conversation I probably would have intuited that my cowboy was maybe not be the best fit for me.

That would have been a good list of criteria for me back then. My list is is different now, and yours will be different too. That contractor cowboy might be perfect for you if you were, say, doing some maintenance on your second home when you weren’t there. Or if you were quickly improving an empty rental property. You wouldn’t care about their daily schedule so much, and you might want someone who could solve some of those details on their own – someone with a high capacity to “make it work.” You would need to be extra careful that you were comfortable with their aesthetic of course, but sometimes cowboys can be just what you need. They just need to be in the right corral.

Right now, my contractor criteria doesn’t change too much as I switch from job to job. I went a skilled professional that will complete the job on time and within the budget, all while offering service with a smile. (Are you familiar with the joke where you add: “pick any two” to that list of three?) Because yes, I do want it all. And I’m willing to pay a premium for it too, within reason. My contractor can make or break my client relationships, so I choose carefully.

But what are some other tips to help you choose your contractor? As I said, my biggest goal is just to get them talking - even in a randomly chatty way helps. I like to use contractors that are from this area, and even better if they have family here. I like them to be invested in the community because then their reputations usually matter to them. Plus, they will have a better handle on the local, quality, subcontractors that I’d also like them to use (like plumbers and electricians.) And they should, of course, be properly licensed and insured. So go ahead and google them or ask for their credentials.

I usually ask for references from their last job - not a job of their choosing. And keep in mind, I’ve been called a number of times as a reference, and I do what I think most people do. I talk about the positives. I wait to be specifically prompted before I’ll offer up anything negative. So if you were calling me? You’d have to get me talking.

Ask questions about the contractor like: What do you see as their strengths? Weaknesses? Were they on schedule? Under budget? What was the process like? Were people arriving and leaving at predictable times? Did the crew seem to get along, or were tensions high on the job site? Did they clean up after themselves? Were there any conflicts? How did those get resolved? And the very vague but handy: Is there anything else you think I should know? But do it all in a warm, conversational tone. No one likes to feel like they’re being grilled, and these days those contractors are interviewing you just as much as you are interviewing them.

And in the end, no matter what you do, it’s still a leap of faith to enter into that contractor relationship. And it is a relationship like any other. It takes a certain amount of thoughtfulness and courtesy and clarity to make it work along the way, so it’s worth taking the time to be a good customer. Even for the cowboys.

– This article was originally published in The Manchester Cricket.

A Warm Hand on Your Cheek?

I’m writing this on Mother’s Day and I’ve just received, and sent, some wonderful texts from and to the mother’s in my life. 

I’m struck by the broadness of the category. I hope those without offspring know they can celebrate it too. A few years ago, my sister told me that she thinks mothering is more of a transitional gray area than black and white. She has found different mothers for herself along the way, and she has noticed (and wants) her kids to do the same. I know I’ve felt that – on both the giving and receiving end. The instinct to metaphorically (or literally) wipe a nose or to place my warm hand on someones cheek, or to be held in a similar way myself. 

So with the spirit of universal mothering in mind, I offer you below some good old fashioned design advice. (And don’t forget to eat your vegetables.)

keep your efforts in perspective and be reasonable
Over the years, I’ve found my advice often falls into the category of fix-it-and-forget-it. It’s what I want for my friends and my clients and for you too. Set up a good system, do the maintenance needed, get it done - and then just live in your home until you do another push. That’s what I do. And as my next “push” grows near, and my baseboards get dinged up and the varnish on my wood floors starts to look threadbare, I buy candles and entertain in the evening! Because everything looks better in candlelight. Even me. And you will too! The point being, don’t sweat it. Don’t stop sharing your home with your friends and loved ones. Otherwise, your home starts owning you, instead of you owning your home.

If it ain’t broke…

Another piece of advice I've offered repeatedly is, "If you love what you have going on – don’t change a thing." If your home is full of love and laughter, if you have chaotic bookshelves but you love every single book like they're your own children, if you entertain freely and often, if there is space for you to live in your home the way you want to live, if your home is a haven to you and your housemates and you can’t wait to step foot through the door… Please, don’t change a thing. THAT is better than any design advice I can give.

Get your nose out of the design websites
It’s a good reference, sure, but after you’ve done your research let your passions guide you, not someone else’s website. This is easy advice for those of you with a “knack” for design, but harder for those that feel like they just don’t have it. And to you I say: stay part of the process. Hire out as you need, but share your passions and your tastes and needs. That bedraggled chair in the corner that only your dog sleeps on? Don’t be afraid to put that on your must-keep list. Be true to your style of living and to your loves and your hates. Keep your “you-ness” in your home because that’s what homes are all about.

I remember helping out at the kid’s preschool where skills like standing-in-line and taking-turns were developed. There were the kids that listened easily and could wait quietly, and they were usually clustered at the front of the line. But I always rooted for the kids in the back of the line. They had ants in their pants and wanted everything NOW. Plus that’s where I always found my youngest daughter. But I related to them, and knew they were just born different. That what comes easy to some does not come easy to others. Not better or worse, just different. Which brings me to my final piece of motherly design advice.


Keep your homes judgement free. God knows I can’t help you with all the aspects of that goal, I'm a work in progress myself. But as your surrogate design-mother for this moment in time, I offer you absolution. There is no right way or wrong way. The way your house looks does not make you a good or bad person. The skill set that you have for maintaining your home, or the lack of it, is eclipsed by all your other fabulous skill sets that are way more important. So, let me place my warm hand on your cheek and say: What your are is enough. What you’ve done with your home is enough. Now go outside and have some fun.

– This article was originally published in The Manchester Cricket.

Time to Sweat the Small Stuff

I was visiting my daughter over the weekend - she’s at college in Providence. Seeing her apartment always reminds me of some of my own when I was her age and renting in Boston. It’s heady stuff – getting those early apartments. Oh the possibilities, the promise, and the adrenalin surge of undeniable autonomy! But, holy moly, what we put up with. Bedrooms without closets or windows, train noise that made the glasses in the sink rattle every eleven minutes, walk-ups where you had to walk up and up and up and up.

I lived briefly in a crowded house on the Cape that had only one toilet, which was broken. So in order to make it flush you had to go back-and-forth, and back-and-forth to the kitchen tap with your gallon jug to fill the tank, and then finally flush your poo. “Wow,” you say, “that’s a lot of work.” Yes, it most certainly was. And, believe me, it did not happen near as much as it should have.

But we were young, and adaptable, and our lives were filled with promise, even if our apartments weren’t. That was then, but what’s our excuse now? Because I see some of the same adaptable nature at play in many of the houses I’m asked to look at.

I had a client a while ago that hired me for a kitchen and bath renovation. Her home was lovely and my project would make it even more so. But as we walked around I noticed that the newel post was wiggly and one of the stair treads was cracked. She complained that there was no place in the foyer to hang coats, and she hated the metal shelving that was in her master closet. We’ve all been there. We all have our own lists. But here she was, about to embark on a sizable, and disruptive renovation – and it didn’t occur to her to put these other items on the list.

As a professional, I charge flatly by the hour, so I have no horse in the race when it comes to the size of the renovation. And I’m very aware of the discomfort my clients feel when their projects (and their budgets) bloat. So I tread lightly on this topic. But I also know from experience that there is just no better time to be further disrupted by your renovation, than when you are already being disrupted by your renovation.

With my client’s project, she already had workers traipsing in and out of her house, and she was already down a kitchen and a bathroom. (I know, it sounds horrible.) But think of the specialists she was going to have at her fingertips: carpenters, electricians, plumbers, tile installers, floor refinishers and painters too. It just makes sense to find out how much extra it will be to add an electrical outlet here, or install shelving there, or to swap out that almond sink you hate in the half bath. There is just no better time.

But I do hear you. “What about the budget?” you are asking. This is an excellent point, and of pivotal importance. Extra work costs extra money – there is just no way around it. But after a sizable, disruptive renovation you have earned the right to that ahhhhhh-this-was-so-worth-it feeling at the end. And it’s hard to feel that way when you are walking around creating yet another list of projects. Plus, that brand new kitchen at the center of your home? It has now set the bar a little bit higher for the rest of the rooms. Suddenly the paint job that you thought was “fine” is now looking dated and dull. Or you are kicking yourself for not refinishing all the floors when you did the kitchen. So yes, these extra details are more expensive, but they are also more integrated into that so-worth-it exhale than you might think.

One thing I do for clients that helps out with this whole business, is to create a “Scope of Work” document. When I do one professionally I include pictures and layouts, but you could do a simplified version for yourself. Yours could be as simple as just making a list. It’s a great exercise for you and your partner to think about your house as a whole and to prioritize your projects. The point is to agree upon and outline the major projects you want to complete, and to add any maintenace “extras” at the end. That sounds easy, right? Well, it can be… or sometimes not. But worth it regardless, because not only are you gaining clarity on the scope of your project, but you’ve also created a great document to obtain estimates with. Because when you are getting quotes from more than one contractor you need to make sure, financially, that you are comparing apples to apples.

By the way, I’m not immune to the pull of adaptation over resolution when it comes to my own home projects. I’m the one that steadied a wobbling radiator with a stack of pennies. I lived with a wire coming out of my bedroom wall for years before I realized it wasn’t connected to anything and I could just pull it out and patch the wall up. If my pipes rattle at full water pressure, I just adjust the stream until it stops. Is it our Yankee-ness? Or just human nature? We will never know for sure. But I know I’ve matured. All of my toilets have been working for years.

– This article was originally published in The Manchester Cricket.

Houseplants: Some In’s and Some Out’s

I have this client that I really like. Why? Well, for starters, she and her family are very nice - deep in their bones nice. And she approaches the aesthetics of her home with both an open-mindedness and a decisiveness that is just such a pleasure to work with. But one other thing I really like is her collection of happy, unusual, well-groomed and thriving plants scattered throughout her home.

I know what a feat that is - because those living things need to be welcomed into your home with some of the same care you might give a new baby. They won’t wake you in the middle of the night, or throw up breast milk onto your dress shirt in the morning - but they are a commitment for sure. And when done right they add to that quality you want in a home. The quality of “Life Happens Here”.

I say this because, I will now confess, I am a little bit of the Angel of Death to many houseplants that have crossed the path of my interior design business. I know, I know. It’s almost like saying I kick puppies, right? But hear me out. Say I’m with a client or a friend who is showing me their house - and a common complaint is that it just doesn’t feel “pulled together” in that home-magazine way they strive for.

With clients it’s easier, because they are willing to pay for change, but for friends that want to do it themselves? Well, it’s tricky advice to give. They start talking about new couch pillows and should they buy all new furniture? But I look around and I frequently see some of the same familiar culprits which really should be addressed as a first step. (Spoiler alert, yes, some houseplants have been harmed in this process.)

The culprits that keep you from figuring out your room’s needs aren’t terribly exciting. You know them already. They are all based around clutter and deep cleaning. When my kids were young, I would stand in thier doorway with a dinosaur in one fist and a sassy little Barbie gown in the other and demand of them, “These items need to find a home!” Because if there is not a home for all the unexpected dribs and drabs that daily infiltrate your very existence - then you’ve already lost the battle.

Other common clutter culprits? Well, those old book-club paperbacks aren’t doing you any favors, and sometimes (the Angel of Death has arrived…) neither are your house plants. Yes, be very afraid you silly, boring, struggling, dusty, unsentimental, plastic-potted, unhealthy, unattractive or ridiculously unwieldly houseplants. I’m coming for you.

You know the ones that have to go - you might even own some. They are those giant (and to me a little creepy) spider plants - and some of their ridiculously prolific offspring which seem to get tucked into yogurt containers and old coffee mugs nearby. They are the sad orchid bases, still in their plastic pots and praying for re-growth.

I had a friend that dutifully saved a (now) massive holiday poinsettia for years. Its pot was still wrapped in that optimistic green tinfoil, and it had grown so much it was now dwarfing the table it was on and gobbling up every ounce of sun from its window. And here my friend is, showing me this room that nobody uses because it’s too dark and too small. I cautiously ask her where she got the poinsettia. “Oh, my neighbor put it out after Christmas a few years back,” she answers. (Shhh… if you listen closely you can hear the beat of the Angel’s wings in the distance.)

But let’s talk a moment about how to do houseplants right. First off, buy the plants that you love from a plant store, not the supermarket or HomeDepot. And learn about them. Where do they need to live? Do you have a spot like that? Are they heavy shedders? Do they need misting? Or are they hearty and can take a week or two with no attention? Be realistic about you skill set and habits and buy a plant accordingly.

Secondly, always re-pot. Or at the very least put the plastic pot into a nicer pot, and then put enough of that moss on top to fool The Angel. And lastly, think of your plant when you purchase it as a little piece of architecture. Do you want tall and spiky? Soft and foofy? Lazy and drapy? They all strike such wonderful unique profiles, so celebrate that and choose carefully. And don't for get to cluster - usually in groups of 3 or 5.

After that the proof will be in the pudding as they say. Not all plants make it. But have a special, out of the way place for struggling plants. They all deserve a chance to survive, but let them struggle with honor in a back hall - not front and center in the family room. I hope my family does the same for me when my Angel starts beating its wings nearby. Come visit me in a quiet back room. Just do me a favor, and put a plant in the window.

– This article was originally published in The Manchester Cricket

Some Impractical Advice
It’s January, and what should we be doing with our homes? Oh let’s see… checking our weather stripping, analyzing our heat loss, watching for ice damns. Ugh… such drudgery.

Me? Cozy, cozy, cozy! That’s all I want. Wake-me-when-its-over cozy. Burrow-in-for-the-winter cozy. Puffy socks and sweet hot beverages and being glad the holidays are over and all that stuff is stored away. ("Nice to see them come, nice to see them go," as my father used to say about them.) Yes, balance has been restored and all is well after the anarchy of the season. I wish I could say the same for this wounded and wonderful country of ours.

Am I good at getting cozy? You bet! But not for myself of course. I’m the mother of four. I became an expert by getting cozy for them. I remember my oldest being sick as a child. He'd be on his bed all flushed and damp, and I’d swoop in and put my hand on his forehead, froof-up his comforter, and tuck in his special stuffed animal. Plumping his pillows up behind him I'd declare, “Young man, I’m going to get you some ginger ale.” And on my way downstairs I'd hear him call after me in a small wavering voice, "With a bendy straw?” Yup. Of course I had them. And after he kept down some liquids and was dreaming of a world with calmer seas - that’s when I knew I’d cozied him up but good.

So as we embark on probably the longest, deepest winter months of our lives, I am offering up just a few tricks of my trade.

Cozy tip #1: An undersized comforter cover. Sounds weird and lumpy and not right - but it’s the same trick designers use with couch pillows - we stuff a larger insert into a smaller case. Just trust me and try it.

I’m divorcing. And amidst the pain and disbelief of a failed marriage after so many years, there came one silver lining. My almost-ex and I were polar opposites on mattress goals. I think we both compromised over the years until neither of us was actually happy with our bed - which is probably an apt metaphor for the marriage.

But when I moved into my own place I got a Serta Pillow Top with the emphasis on the pillow top. No memory foam here. No it-expands-after-it-gets-delivered. No it-will-take-a-few-weeks-to-break-in. This mattress came as a big poofy rectangle. And the top is deliciously soft. Couple that with a linen duvet cover a size smaller than my actual duvet….. and…. nirvana. Just ask my damn cats, because I can’t get them off my bed. Honestly. They tuck themselves into the folds and then somehow they triple in weight, so that when I try to shake them off, they just anchor in and roll with the waves. My marriage should have had some of that same commitment.

Cozy tip #2 Be thoughtful about your couch blankets - and this gets personal. But if you are using a discarded blanket from your daughter’s room, or a wool heirloom that needs to be dry-cleaned - you are doing it all wrong. I’ll share with you my criteria - but you will have your own. For me, I have lots of kids and lots of pets and lots of ins and lots of outs. My number one criteria is washability. Because, in my house, we are a messy bunch. We have happy hours at the coffee table and lingering coffee’s at the same place in the morning. And I see the spills and the lazy I-don’t-want -to-grab-a-napkin wipes. And so do they. And all of us can relax in knowing that these blankets are easily and frequently washed. My second criteria is based on tactile appeal. I’ve been partial to some high quality fleece ones lately, but sometimes in the summer I swap them out with thin cotton quilts. I don’t worry for a second about color coordinating with the couch (I don’t particularly like that blanketed couch look anyway.) I go for pure function, and stuff those blankets into a big basket, keep them clean, and just let it roll. But like I said, that’s me. You do you.

Cozy tip #3 This is one of the few self care regiments that I do adhere to: no cold feet. Slippers for everyone are available - even for my kids that don’t “live” here. And you know what else? Even though it’s awful for my floors and I’m sure not very Marie Kondo, I let the shoes stay on throughout the house. If that keeps the toes warm and the good cheer flowing, it seems a small price to pay.

And as the head of household keeping all kinds of crazy hours sitting at my desk? Well, I splurged on a twelve dollar hot water bottle. Sometimes I put it under my feet at my desk. Sometimes under the covers at night. It’s not exactly a husband, but it also doesn’t complain about my pillow top mattress.

Like I said. These are my tips. Yours will be different - but you get the idea. Because no matter how you do it - cozying up beats the heck out of installing weather stripping.

– This article was originally published in The Manchester Cricket.

Hello? It's Your Home Calling
So there went Valentine's Day. And what are the chances of this almost divorced, hardworking, under-appreciated, mother of four being sparky about a holiday that truly only works for so few people in the universe? You're right. The chances are slim.

But it all got me to thinking - what are some little Valentine gifts we can give to our hardworking, under appreciated and often taken for granted homes? And I don’t mean the chocolates and the roses (for your home that would be paint and getting the floors done.) I mean the thoughtful little things we do to make another feel seen, acknowledged, and appreciated. Speak to me, homes. I’m here for you. What are your top ten requests?

#1. Your home wants you to take out the kitchen trash and give the closet, the cabinet, the bins and anything even close to touching these items a good antiseptic rub down.

#2. Your home also says, "Please put something nice on your windowsill." Something that you will enjoy when you are looking out, and when you are looking in too. A shrine. To you, and to your home.

#3. Some homes report there is still holiday stuff about?? It’s ok. No judgment. Just take it down. It’s over. It’s time. (And yes, you’re welcome.)

#4. Yes, that includes the front door holiday wreath. Yeesh!

#5. But... maybe not so fast on the small white Christmas lights.? My mom kept hers up year round, because they made her feel celebratory. She liked anything that sparkled. If that’s you... go for it. Maybe don’t keep them up for the whole year… But, sure, let them linger during these dark winter months. If you like them, your home will too.

#6. Some homes are asking for you to vacuum your furniture. That’s right - take the cushions off, vacuum both their sides, plus get in all the crevices of the frame (yuk). And then jump around on those cushions like a lunatic. Go get your kids to help! It resets all that muscle memory built into the foam and feather inserts. I mean, you know how you feel after a deep tissue massage, right? I think we could all use a little plump-up like that right now.

#7. We’ll lump these next items together - it will seem like less work that way. But give your foyer, your coat closet or coat rack, your junk mail bin, your key bowl, your front porch, your basket of pine cones, the dirt and ice and grime on the floor, the boot rack… Give it all a little love. It’s almost like brushing your teeth before a date. This is the entrance to your home - have it represent you well.

#8. This one’s important: homes like living things. It is an amazing truth that an abandoned property deteriorates at a much more rapid pace than when a family is living in it, even when that family does absolutely no maintenance. So bring some outside in. Flowers or orchids or a rosemary plant.

I’ve had my paper whites up since December. I just can’t part with those long green leaves even though they are now flopping over and I’ve had to create a pretty ingenious leaf band tied around their middles to prop them up. Go outside and clip pretty branches, evergreen leaves, driftwood, berries. It will make you and your home feel better.

#9. I’ve got a home in the back yelling at me, “Hey, set the table now and then!” Yes, you're right, I've lost my mojo. I really do need to do that more.

#10. And lastly, (and all your homes are in full agreement) - cultivate joy. My kids went to a local preschool, aptly called MagicYears. I had ten years between my oldest and youngest, so I spent a fair amount of time on the play-ground of that preschool - helping out or waiting for the kids to get released.

Early on I noticed this brave little tree that someone had planted as a thank you gift. I thought that tree didn’t stand a chance. I mean it really started as a springy twig, but the kids gave it all the respect they would give a more seasoned tree. They congregated around it, and strategized below it, and climbed it, and attempted to hang upside-down off it’s one poor little extended limb. I sort of silently thanked it for it’s service and promised to pay it a visit in the compost pile when it was finally resting there. But over the years, surprisingly enough, that little tree thrived. Sort of like my uterus in fact, as I kept turning up with a new baby in tow.

So cultivate joy. Have a pillow fight. FaceTime a friend. Keep up your sparkly lights. Live, dance, love, cry - like you mean it. With fearless abandon. Even in the face of everything. Maybe because of all we are facing. There is really no better time to figure out a way to celebrate than this moment right now. Because homes, and all of us really, like living things.

– This article was first published in The Manchester Cricket.

A Quick Fix Can Sometimes Be Just What You Need
See you later 2020. It’s so nice to see you go, that I almost feel bad. I was on an elevator once when someone brought on an ancient service dog that looked so sweet as he entered, but that made my eyes water by farting his way up to his floor. As he was being led out, he looked up at me as if to say, “Sorry lady, I’m just doing what I do.” 2020 was a little like that for me.

So in response, I’m looking toward some home projects that offer quick fixes and instant gratification. And what is your strongest ally when it comes to that? Paint of course! It’s affordable, relatively easy, and the results have a huge impact. Take on a small fun project, and pick a spot that will be make you smile. Be bold! Have fun! If you hate it - you can just paint it back. Use a cheerful hibiscus, or a summer sky blue, a warm tomato-soup red, or a jewel green – just something that you love.

And where to paint? Just about anywhere. Paint the door to your basement, the back panels of your bookcase, the cabinets of your kitchen island, the ceiling of your bathroom, the bench in your mudroom, your stair risers, your cat - anything is fair game. Because it’s just paint! Is it a little risky? Yes. But that’s why the projects are small. Unleash that beast for a weekend and just see where you land.

And guess what? Wallpaper is back IN and it’s going everywhere. It can go on all the same surfaces I listed for the paint - including certain types of furniture and your cat. There are tons that are peel and stick for easy install and removal. And you’ll also find all different kinds of wall decals - which is a very low commitment way to get that wallpaper look when you apply them carefully and evenly spaced. Google it all, and plan carefully - even if it is just a small weekend project.

I remember a tumultuous time in my early twenties, when I went to my regular hair appointment and on the spot decided to go from long hair to a pixie cut. And when she was done and sweeping up my long locks from the floor, I stared into that mirror and felt that tumult still in my belly and thought, “Well, I guess it wasn’t the hair.” So, yes, break out of your comfort zone - but in the process make sure you’re not doing any lasting damage that will be difficult to undo. This is not the time to take down a wall, or paint that family heirloom. And don’t really paint the cat.

One last idea to look into? Peel and stick tiles - they are self-adhesive pictures of tiles. These work best when you match the size of, say, that 4” x 4” baby blue tile backsplash, with a 4” x 4” tile sticker. You put them on individually and leave the grout. And within a few hours you can, poof, be in a Mexican cantina or an Italian grotto or in a hipster coffee shop - it’s up to you. (I wish they had these when I was apartment hopping in Boston years ago.)

They aren’t exactly cheap, but they’re not that expensive either for the impact they offer. Supposedly some are good for high traffic and wet areas – which I have trouble believing, but try them out and tell me what you think. They are perfect for a powder room or backsplash. You’ll find lots of them on Etsy.com with before and after pictures and reviews. And you can buy just a few at first, to try them out.


Does any of that help? Did it distract you for even just a minute from the fact that New Years Day was really just like any other quarantine day? I hope so. We are told there is a light at the end, but so far all I see is tunnel. So while we’re all here, let’s tile-sticker the hell out of that tunnel. And maybe the cat too.

– This article was originally published in The Manchester Cricket.

Breaking Bread and Breaking Convention
I recently had some friends over for dinner. I thought we’d eat in the living room, and had our chairs all set up. But my guests came in as a group and while I was busy with the bustle and the greetings and the coats, they all plopped themselves around my dining room table. It was so organic and so perfect that I just quietly swapped the buffet setup for place settings, and took a seat myself. There was wisdom in that collective, unspoken urge to sit together - and I certainly wasn’t going to argue.

But dining rooms (or dining areas) in general, have polarizing forces. They are either working overtime for meals, work, crafts, homework, card games, cookie decorating, science projects, and even diaper changes. Or they are never used at all. There they sit, housing Aunt Betty’s complete Queen Ann dining set. It’s begging you to throw a formal dinner party, but yeesh, that kind of meal is so much work. Just take a look inside Betty’s buffet cabinet - it’s loaded with items that need to be polished and ironed and hand washed.

Now I’m not knocking the formal meal. I’m just a fan of using spaces. Do you throw formal dinner parties frequently? Do you love the excuse to take out the wedding china and polish up the silver? Are the formal soirees that you throw lively events where people linger at the table longer than you anticipated? If you answer yes, well then don’t change a thing. That’s everything dining rooms were made for - it doesn’t matter what your entertaining style is. But if you answer no, then you may want a dining area that is more reflective of who you are and how you like to entertain.

Let me do some of you a favor. As your interior design fairy I wave my magic wand and hereby release you from that old dining set. Yes, yes, yes, I know it’s sturdy as heck, and hey look at that inlay, and they sure don’t make them like they used to, and we got it on our honeymoon and we’re saving it for the kids. I’ve heard it all before. But none of those are reasons good enough to keep something that doesn’t represent you accurately. Plus, that “heirloom”? None of the kids want them. Understandably, it’s not nice to burden the next generation with the same furniture that never really worked for you.

A million years ago, when I was in design school, I presented three ideas for an assignment and was very proud of my work. My professor noted that although they were pretty, they didn’t address an important problem that the assignment presented. And he told me to (literally) go back to the drawing board. I spoke with him after class and got all blustery and defensive about my approach. He cut me off and looked me square in the eye and said, “Creating good design means you sometimes have to kill your own children.” That stopped me in my tracks, and obviously I never forgot it.

I share that story to prepare you. You: “Well, what would I do with it?” Me (buckle up): “If you are lucky you may be able to sell it for a fraction of its value.” There I said it.

There are high-end consignment stores, and of course Craig’s List, and also donation. But there is little to no market for these pieces. I can hear some of you gasping for air, so let me pause here to gently remind you that not knowing what to do with a table you don’t like (or anything for that matter,) is not a good enough reason to keep it. Because if you do, then that furniture owns you - not visa versa.

And holy Covid, global warming, and the politics of today! Life is so short!!! Live your life as your most authentic self! And there is no better starting point than to update the place where you break bread and connect with other humans. I declare the contract that you had with that old furniture null and void. You are FREE!

I’m going to manifest this for you. I’m picturing your old table gone and your new dining area taking shape. It has padded comfortable chairs and accessories unique to you. There’s a new wall color and less formal drapes, and you find your family gravitating to that spot to work or play or eat. Maybe the room is now better set up for multi-function use - it could double as a project area or an office. And maybe you find yourself sipping a cup of coffee in there, simply because it’s a place where you want to be.

What could be better than all that, you ask? Well, in my opinion, decorating your table for the seasons is the icing on the cake. My Halloween decor includes plastic rats and glitter skulls - but find your own groove. There is so much to choose from in the fall. Gourds, and twigs with berries, and branches with their turning leaves still attached. Pinterest abounds for inspiration. Or go to the dollar store. Turns out, plastic rats are surprisingly low priced.

– This article was originally published in The Manchester Cricket.

Extending the Life of Your Hardworking Kitchen
My friend sent me a picture of her amazing fall hydrangeas. Aren’t hydrangeas something?Look at ALL those flowers they produce, and for such a long time. (What are they eating? Because I’ll have what they’re having.) And right when most of the other plants are thinking about grabbing their winter sweaters and curling up, these flowers are still evolving - turning colors only mother nature can invent. “Don’t count us out yet,” they say, “It’s getting chilly, but look at us out now!”

I thought of those hydrangeas as I was talking with another friend over the weekend. She’s a fabulous cook and was excited about breathing some new life into her 26-year old kitchen. (“Don’t count me out yet!” that kitchen calls to me.) She tells me about it, and starts with the thing that excites her most - the new island. She’ll finally get seating in the kitchen and more storage and more counter space and she can’t wait. And then she pauses.

“Well, the formica counters look awful too.” she continues. “And the kitchen cabinets are working ok but I don’t like the look. Maybe I'll paint them... Definitely new hardware… The floors are a mess… And I always did want to knock down that wall into the living room.”

There it is. It’s what I call project sprawl - and it’s very real and can be overwhelming. Where do you start? And just as importantly, where do you stop? I talk to clients about this same thing all the time - especially with bathrooms and kitchens. Where is that tipping point? When are you just putting good money into a bandaid that would have been better saved for a more complete renovation?

Are you thinking: Oh, those predatory designers (or contractors) - aren’t they always just trying to soak you for more and more billings? And for sure, do your homework to make sure you are working with reputable people. But good professionals aren’t invested in your project in that way.

For me, it’s just my job to talk about your options. I’ve never heard a client say - oh I wish we had done less, but I have heard them say they wish they had done more. That is assuming, of course, that they can afford it. Because the other part of a my job is to work within a budget, plan properly for the future, and to make sure you are getting the biggest impact for your dollar.

Ok, back to my friend’s kitchen - do I crush her dreams of getting that kitchen updated? Well, she has shared a few telling facts. The kitchen is 26 years old, it has formica countertops, she really wants an island, and she loves to cook. So, me? Her designer friend? I’m guessing her cabinets are nearing the end of their life-span. She’ll probably want a stone counter which is an investment, and does it really make sense to put that on top of your 26 year old cabinets? And the island that started it all? Traditional built-in ones certainly aren’t cheap. And the last damning tidbit? She shared that she’s always wanted a different layout. Beep, beep, beep! In my view, that tipping point reached. (“Sorry,” I say to that 1990’s kitchen.)

But in the mean time, she still wants to give it a facelift. What areas can she improve while saving the real money for her dream kitchen? Well, she can take on the affordable projects that won’t lock her into something down the road. I suggest a freestanding island, with as many of the features as she can easily afford - something she might be able to sell later. The cabinets? Yes, she can paint them herself - but beware, painting them is truly a labor of love. There are all kinds of designer hacks for this stuff - just give it a Google.

Yes, to a new wall color. And go ahead and put in a new light fixture and faucet and cabinet hardware, but choose carefully so you can hopefully re-use them down the road. If you are putting off that renovation for years, go ahead and refinish those floors - I’m sure your other ones need some love too. Counters? Only if you must. But if you do, get creative and don’t spend more than a few hundred dollars. (Ikea butcher block perhaps?) I’ve saved my final yes for some of that peel and stick backsplash tile that I think usually looks horrible. Just promise me you’ll use the simplest one you can find.

And there you have it. Just in time to make me some cookies!

– This article was originally published in The Manchester Cricket.

Keeping the Embers of Summer Burning
Here I am looking at the start of my favorite month, which I’ve named Septober for the second half of September and the first half of October. Yet I find myself melancholy at the close of this summer. I tend my wounds left by the months of Covid restrictions, the wounds of a failed marriage, and the bittersweet taste of my kids launching into this world of uncertainty. I find myself down the vacuous cavern of my half empty glass and think, if I jumped in there - would I really hit water?

But those feelings, like everything else these days, are fleeting. This morning I did jump into that glass - and there it was. Half full! And the water was fine. More than fine. It was delicious and buoyant and filled with hope. And looking up into that big half empty cavern above? I see sunshine. Bring it on Septober. I’ve got big plans for you. And I’m not finished with my outdoor-socially-distanced-appropriately-sized-small-gatherings yet, so your brisk weather doesn’t scare me. All I need is a good fire pit!

Fire pits can be bought, built-in to your landscape, or spontaneously created with a Webber-type coal grill and some insta-burn wood from 7-11. There are many features to consider, but let’s break it down into the two big categories first: gas or wood. I think there tends to be a knee-jerk nod toward the romance of the crackling wood and the burning flame - but one only has to remember sitting downwind of a roaring campfire to know some of the pitfalls.

When I was in high school I went to a beach bonfire and I was so hell bent on sitting near that bohemian college-boy, that I plopped down square in the path of the twisting smoke. I sat there blinking my eyes and trying to “act natural” as I willed myself not to cough or wince when the embers burned their way through my sweater. The college boy finally did notice me, but he laughed at my plight, and that stung most of all. For days, that smokey smell would re-ignited itself in my scalp whenever I broke a sweat. An acrid reminder of my unrequited love.

Long way of saying…. don’t rule out the gas fire pit right away. Gas fires can be high on style and there are plenty that are easy on the pocketbook. They are so easy to light that you might turn it on just for your morning coffee, and their flame is adjustable to your climate or the time of day. In general they don’t give off the same amount of heat as a traditional fire can, but their smoke-free flame is predictable and the heat is reliable and environmentally friendly.

But that gas fuel supply does take some planning. For a permanent fire pit, you’d want to have a gas line installed by your licensed plumber. But for a portable solution you just need to plan a way to stash that tank. Some models address this issue and incorporate the gas storage into the design. Just shop around.

But for some there is absolutely no replacement for the actual burning log. It snaps and pops, it smells like camping, and then there are the marshmallows. Creating a built-in variety can be a pretty rewarding DIY project. A quick early morning google and a trip to HomeDepot can get you up and running that same night. (But please, safety first, and look into permits too.) Or that same trip to HomeDepot can supply you with any number of pre-made models. For me, I’m limited on patio space, so I got one that has a wide border for tipping your feet against, a dome-shaped screen to control the embers, and a top so that when it’s not in use it just operates like a coffee table. But you figure out the features that work for you.

If you want your fire pit to be in the middle of your seating, you may want to consider some sort of chimney. They help to prevent that full throttle face of smoke from my cautionary tale above. There are those gourd shaped fire pits called chimera’s. They’ve got that groovy vibe and they do control the smoke - but you miss out on some of the enjoyment of the flame. But there are other chimney solutions out there that are built into domed screens. They claim to give you the best of both worlds, but your guests will be the ultimate judge.

So fear not, my compatriots with melancholy hearts like mine. Help is on the way. And it comes in the shape of a fire pit. Break out the marshmallows.

– This article was originally published in The Manchester Cricket.

He Said She Shed
Why is it a she-shed and not a he-shed? Because us women have given you your man caves. And we also know that even if we had a basement woman-cave… we would still be found. There needs to be wet grass and gravel between you and someone wondering where the mustard is. And even then, there are no guarantees.

We had our first shed put up when the kids were young. We went through one of those shed companies that comes to your house and puts up this little mini-house in about a blink of an eye. I swear I went up to change a diaper and I came down and there it was.

Our first house was about 1300 square feet. My youngest daughter, and bonus baby of four, spent more than a few nights swaddled in a laundry basket next to my bed. My office was a converted closet. The “play room” for the kids was an uninsulated back hall. (Bundle up kids!) Real estate was a coveted commodity in our house, for sure.

So, after the magic shed fairies left, and the baby went down, I tiptoed out back to check it out. And there it was, a 10 x 12 empty space! I had never seen anything so glorious. And make no mistake - that space was spoken for. We had the Big Wheels, scooters and lawn gear all piled up ready to go in it. But just for that one, childless, quiet moment I laid down on that floor and considered the possibilities. I remember the smell of the pine, and the lazy drift of the construction dust settling in the sunlight and I thought, “This is all I need. Truly all I need.”

Blink again, and my shed is stuffed with the detritus of our lives - it was spoken for, my needs didn’t stand a chance. But that ahhhhh moment? That is at the heart of every she-shed. It doesn’t matter if it’s an office, a reading nook, or a yoga studio. The exhale is just built in. And here we are, looking at probably another Covid winter of working/schooling/doing everything from home - don’t you want one? Summer’s almost over, you better get busy.

So first off choose your shed. There are many companies employing shed fairies now. I like the ones that are more “cottage” than “shed”. Or then I swing the other way and like the ones that are a little more boxy and mid-century. So it doesn’t matter, but choose carefully. Think about the one task you primarily want to accomplish when you are in there (yes, doing nothing counts) and make sure you have the right set-up. I like it to have one big opening - it can be gated barn doors or even garage-style. But some people like the cute cottage-y front doors and a little more privacy.

Secondly, pee all over the shed. Ok, not literally. But do mark your territory. If you set up a beautiful office space but your husband wants the back end for his fertilizer and, "Honey, space for the lawnmower just for the winter!".… You’ve already lost. You can’t really have a shed that doubles as an office. What you get is a makeshift office in a depressing room that smells like gasoline. So it’s up to you. But you might need two sheds.

Hopefully your wifi will reach in there - or maybe hopefully not, depending on your goals. But power is a topic worth considering. Obviously you can hire an electrician - and as long as it’s just a couple of outlets and maybe an overhead light, it’s not actually that expensive. But, unless you are digging a trench, you’ll see the power line coming over. Another off-the-grid route is to get a power pack. (Think boat or tiny house.) Some have optional solar panels, so you can save the polar bears while you’re at it.

Your last and biggest challenge for your 3-season she-shed, is heat. I read that 40% of the heat is lost through the floor. I’m not sure if that’s true, but I’ll take the point and am recommending a rug. Or anything that amounts to a second layer of insulation on the floor. Also space heaters have come a long way and you can get inexpensive ones that claim to heat a room with very little (power pack) energy. And of course there are the little wood stoves which need to have a chimney installed. Just remember, safety first on those.

Should I insulate you say? Nooooooo! Then you are creating an “outbuilding” - and other standards apply. Remember this is a shed. It’s a little bit like camping in a yurt. It’s a super great experience and better than a tent, but you are still sleeping in a yurt. I see lots of pictures of she-sheds with overstuffed couches, white paneled curtains and sheep skin throw rugs. And I know they look great for the photo shoot, but all I think of is mildew and sour upholstery. Make your place easy to clean and maintain. If I had a bed out there, I’d use one of those plastic slips to protect it. And blankets that were easy to wash. And venetian blinds instead of curtains. And a low pile rug. (You can probably guess how I raised my kids.)

Just be practical. And breath in that space that is all yours. And then you exhale.

– This article was originally printed in The Manchester Cricket

When To Go Pro

Today, we are just going to chat. No suggestions that take any work on your part. Just the nuts and bolts about whether or not you need an interior designer. So grab a cup of coffee and bring me a cookie, and we can get started.

What do interior designers do anyway?
That’s a tough question because the scenario’s are inevitably so different - but let’s say you are renovating a kitchen. Well, in the planning phase, your designer will visit your home and discuss what you like and don’t like. They will ask about your usage and habits, and note the architectural constraints. They will eventually create idea or style boards so that you are both really clear on what you are trying to achieve.

They will draw up ideas in a software that will make the project easy for you to visualize, and with those drawings, they can help you bid out your project and also help the contractor to get permits. Stylistically, they will make sure the new blends with the old, and they will shop with you to ensure your finishes are in keeping with your goals. Their ideas will be well-thought out and will make even complex solutions look simple.

They will make sure you have made decisions in advance, so you aren't wasting the valuable (and expensive) time of your construction crew. And as construction proceeds, they will be there to check on the progress and to make sure the standards are in line with your expectations. They might even bring coffee! And if you have a good one, they will make this typically stressful process of renovation... dare I say fun? Yes, I dare! Even fun.

How do I know if I need a professional?
hmmmm..... I’m going to use physical therapy as an analogy. Say you go to the gym and your knee hurts - do you go to PT? Well maybe you do, or maybe not. You may be familiar with how your knees work, and so you do some research and you also might talk to a friend who has had the same knee problem. Maybe you strengthen those muscles yourself. Or sometimes you need just a few PT visits to clarify things. But, say you’re having ACL surgery - the stakes are pretty high and you’re going to want to have a good physical therapist lined up before the surgery. Have I totally confused you? (hint: Your ACL is a large renovation project, and I’m the physical therapist)

Here’s the thing, I’m all about DIY but does that mean you should be? Not if you don’t want to, or if you want a result that goes beyond your abilities. Do you need to go “all in” with a professional? Not necessarily. Some designers work on a consultant basis and will give you just the help you need. Should you get in way over your head? Of course not! There are options out there to help you!

How much does it cost?
Here’s the bad news... interior designers are expensive!! And here’s some more bad news - so is your contractor, and all your materials and your furnishings too. The whole thing is expensive - so in that sense, an interior designer can be a valuable investment.

Designer rates come in all shapes and sizes. Additionally, different design firms bill differently. For instance, I charge flat by the hour - but many firms mark-up purchases, and charge for warrantees, etc. There is no wrong or right - but before you hire a designer, you should have a crystal clear understanding of their billing practices.

Can you find a bargain? Sure you can. But make sure the skill set of your designer aligns with the needs of your project. If you are planning a kitchen and live in an antique house, get someone with (wait for it) lots of experience with old houses and kitchens.

Ok, I think I need one - but how do I choose?
At the end of the day, a big part of it is how you connect with a designer's approach, their communication, the quality of their work, and their ability to plan properly so there aren't any surprises. Ask your friends, check their references. I personally like local people with a stake and reputation in the community. Engage them in conversations, do you like them? Hey, you are about to embark on an intimate relationship. I mean not crazy-intimate, but enough so that you want to make sure you’ve done your due diligence.

I can’t afford one. Isn’t there another way?
Of course there is! This reminds me of my first house. I furnished it at the local flea market. (A shout out to my fellow early morning scavengers). We put in a kitchen instead of taking a vacation. I used a stack of pennies to fix a wobbly radiator. We just worked away on that house one room at a time and pretty much got it done.

So, yes! Resourcefulness and a scrappy attitude can get you pretty far. But do your research. Read up on the stages of a construction project. Talk to your friends that have been through it. Ask lots of questions. Create an idea board on Pinterest or gather magazine clippings in a folder. If you don’t have a good eye yourself, bribe your sister with a post-shop martini to choose materials with you.

And this part is important, work with a quality contractor whose work you know. Especially if you are not working with a designer. The good contractors are designers and guides in their own rights, so spend a little extra money and get a good one.

Any other tips?
Sure, utilize anyone with talent. Do you like the colors in your friends house? Be shameless and ask her for the paint names. Call and see if your paint store works with a specialist for free. Ask around for names of good salespeople for wallpaper, cabinets, plumbing supplies, and tile. There is lots of free talent out there. Just keep in mind that those representatives are in the business of selling you products. They may have great instincts, but they are not invested in your project's aesthetics as a whole - you have to be the one to do that.

And my final tip for the DIYers? When in doubt, keep it simple. Follow your inspiration photos. Don’t take on too much. Now go grab yourself a cookie... you just earned it!

– This article was originally published in The Manchester Cricket.

The Unruly Photo Beast

Some of you are inundated with photos and love every minute of it. I see you. You are surrounded by oodles of mis-matched frames, and have blown up photo posters on your wall, and every school portrait ever taken framed on your mantle. And if we opened up those frames, you know what we would find? More photos tucked in behind! And you LOVE each and every one. The thought of eliminating any of them leaves you feeling un-moored, without a family, and depressed. If this is you, please don’t change a thing. I love that you love them.

But I also know there are others more like me. Especially if you are like me and your kids are mostly grown. All the photos can can make me feel like I'm living with this multi-tentacled beast that oozes into every nook and cranny of my home. There are the yellowed scrapbooks with those awful sticky pages in the attic, manilla envelopes with ancient family pics tucked in a bookshelf, and well-intentioned file folders of photos for each of my poor kids that never actually got a scrap book.

So if this is you, I’m here to tell you there is hope! Here is your first assignment: Collect all the photos in your house and dump them on your bed. Yes everything. All your piles and scrapbooks and frames from the Christmas Tree Shop. Collect them ALL. Now remove all the photos. (Not the heirlooms of course.) So that you end up with an overwhelming pile of photos, and another pile of what will probably be trash, but I’m jumping ahead.

Ok, let the games begin. Do a giant sort and edit. Then sort and edit those. And sort and edit all of it one more time. With any luck, and lots of discipline, you should now have 1 full trash bag, 1 large pile of frames you will donate, 1 smaller pile of frames you will use, and then a whole mess of piles of sorted photos on your bed. (Me? One of my piles is a superstar pile - my absolute favorites that I keep handy for a bulletin board or to embarrass my kids with.)

A word on sorting and editing: first of all - enjoy it! It’s a really nice way to review your life, and linger with those memories. But I know it can also be really hard, because you should be keeping maybe 1/4 of the photos that you now have on your bed. If you stay focused and keep your eye on the prize - it will happen naturally. You will realize that you only need 1 or 2 faded polaroids from that trip to Aruba when you were 17. The goal is to mark some interesting events, and to keep your exceptional photos. And that’s all. Your children will thank you for it. And, trust me, afterward you will feel LIBERATED!

Now that we’ve sorted out our absolute favorites, we can move on to talking about how to display them. Walk around your house and pick maybe 2-3 places to display your exceptional photos. I’m not a huge fan of the big blown up ones. I keep mine small - so they need to be displayed intimately, where people can stand close.

Surprisingly, guest bathrooms can be the perfect spot, but there are hallways, or bulletin boards near a desk, or maybe a sideboard or mantle like your parent's had. But focus on a few places to cluster your photos instead of sprinkling them evenly throughout your home.

Next, let’s think about groups. There are two areas to group - the style of your frames, and the content of the photos. So maybe you have a mis-matched set of frames, but they are all black so they work together. They will be perfect to display all the boats your family has owned. You may need to add some new, tasteful frames to your collection to flush it out. (Buying new frames, you gasp? When I’ve just disposed of so many?? Yes, counter-intuitive I know, but it must be done.)

To hang a cluster of photos, I trace the sizes on paper and tape them to the wall first, so I can get the balance right. Then I hang the actual photos using that layout as my guide.

Another display solution that is more fluid and can easily handle new additions is to mount art ledges. You can find them anywhere online, but I make my own out of trim from HomeDepot, because I like a smaller profile and custom lengths. But either way, you can lean your groupings (in their tasteful frames) on these ledges and as the years pass you can juggle the photos around and easily update them.

Well, that was fun - but we still have all the piles of photos on your bed. What do we do with those? I like the photo box method with labeled dividers. But remember, you really shouldn’t have much more than 2-3 boxes total. The boxes can go on a shelf or you can store all photo related stuff in a large tub that will also fit your oversized prints, and head to the attic.

For bonus points, get them scanned in. That way your old printed photos meet up with your digital photos (which you probably have a million of - but that’s a topic for another day) and they can be all sorted and labeled and live happily ever after in the cloud for generations to come. Or go farther still and create one of the online photo albums. They take some work, and are expensive, but they take up much less room than a traditional photo album. Plus you can order multiples.

But one step at a time. Be patient, but do forge ahead. Freedom is your reward!

– This article was originally printed in The Manchester Cricket.